Should Men and Women Be Friends? Why or Why Not?

Nick Slade

Written by: Nick Slade

Nick Slade

Nick spent 20 years in the dating scene before marriage. He has always been the guy friends would come to for advice on relationships, and he developed a knack for giving helpful insights. After college, Nick was a disc jockey for a few years, when the love generation was still alive, so Nick has a lot of relevant experience to draw from when it comes to every aspect of dating, falling in love and screwing things up. He holds Bachelor's degree in humanities and a slew of master’s credits in journalism. Nick is a news junkie and tries to keep up on the latest non-fiction when he has time. He has published two books on how to win at dating and relationships.

Edited by: Lillian Castro

Lillian Castro

Lillian Guevara-Castro brings more than 30 years of journalism experience to ensure DatingAdvice articles have been edited for overall clarity, accuracy, and reader engagement. She has worked at The Atlanta Journal and Constitution, The Gwinnett Daily News, and The Gainesville Sun covering lifestyle topics.

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Nature draws men and women together for a purpose other than friendship. There are a few exceptions that totally eliminate the likelihood of attraction.

If you first meet a woman as the girlfriend of a good friend or relative, your sexual antennae are also turned off, and you might discover that you cannot even become attracted to her if she later becomes available.

If you meet a woman with a husband or boyfriend but have never met her guy, all bets are off. Harmless attraction and flirting can end up leading to more.

Of course, there are exceptions to every rule, and a lot of time alone together can also allow the forces of nature to overpower our civilized instincts. Men and women can be friends in groups, but if there is a reason they should end up getting romantic, it is usually not a good idea for them to hang out together too often without other common friends around in order to keep a platonic “feel” to the situation.

Even if they are both unattached, there can be trouble. There is a high likelihood that one of them will come to desire more than friendship from the relationship while the other will not.

Male-female attraction is a powerful force that can be difficult to keep in check when there is nothing or no one to enforce social boundaries.

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