We Haven’t Defined the Relationship. What’s Your Advice?

We Havent Defined The Relationship Whats Your Advice
Updated:
Dr. Wendy Walsh
Lillian Castro

By: Dr. Wendy Walsh

Editor: Lillian Castro

Our dating experts guide readers step-by-step through relationship challenges and romantic decisions in our popular series of advice articles.

Reader Question:

I have spent the night with the same girl for multiple weekends in a row. I called her this week and she told me she was putting makeup on to go out to have a drink of wine with another guy, but she insisted it was casual. She then sends a text asking if my feelings were hurt because she was going out with another guy. She has made a few statements here and there about how our relationship hasn’t been defined and we will have the talk. She then posted a picture of the “date” on a social media site. Advice needed.

-Jake (Michigan)

Dr. Wendy Walsh’s Answer:

She is doing everything she can do to make you pursue her harder. This woman is looking for relationship definition, but probably isn’t brave enough to ask directly and insist on exclusivity. So she’s trying to get you to do it, by flaunting another guy.

The ball is now in your court. If you want her to be your exclusive girlfriend, ask her. If not then, keep hooking up with her and all the other guys’ germs.


No counseling or psychotherapy advice: The Site does not provide psychotherapy advice. The Site is intended only for use by consumers in search of general information of interest pertaining to problems people may face as individuals and in relationships and related topics. Content is not intended to replace or serve as substitute for professional consultation or service. Contained observations and opinions should not be misconstrued as specific counseling advice.

About the Author

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Dr. Wendy Walsh

By: Dr. Wendy Walsh

Women's Dating Expert

Known as America's Relationship Expert, Dr. Wendy Walsh is an award-winning television journalist, radio host & podcaster, and the author of three books on relationships and thousands of print and digital articles. More than 1.5 million people follow her sage advice on social media. She holds a Ph.D. in Clinical Psychology and teaches in the Psychology Department at California State University Channel Islands and has been the host of "The Dr. Wendy Walsh Show" on iHeart Radio's KFI AM 640 since 2015. Walsh is also a former Emmy-nominated co-host of "The Doctors," as well as former host of the nationally syndicated show "EXTRA." She was named a Time Magazine Person of the Year in 2017 after speaking out about harassment at a major news network.

See Dr. Wendy's full bio »

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