5 Ways To Stop Nagging Him And Still Get What You Want

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5 Ways to Stop Nagging Him and Still Get What You Want

Rachel Dack

Written by: Rachel Dack

Rachel Dack

Rachel Dack is a licensed clinical professional counselor (LCPC) and relationship coach specializing in individual and couples psychotherapy. Rachel's areas of expertise include relationships, dating, mindfulness, anxiety, depression and self-esteem.

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Edited by: Lillian Castro

Lillian Castro

Lillian Guevara-Castro brings more than 30 years of journalism experience to ensure DatingAdvice articles have been edited for overall clarity, accuracy, and reader engagement. She has worked at The Atlanta Journal and Constitution, The Gwinnett Daily News, and The Gainesville Sun covering lifestyle topics.

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Nagging prevents communication from being effective and can get in the way of emotional closeness and intimacy with your special guy.

Nagging behaviors tend to push men away instead of bring them closer to you and can lead to distance and tension in relationships.

Therefore, nagging behaviors are not the best way to maintain a healthy relationship, get what you want and have your needs met.

What causes you to nag him?

Nagging generally arises from your frustration about feeling unheard and commonly sets up defensiveness from your partner.

Although you might believe saying what you want and making pleas multiple times or in different ways gets you want you want, nagging does not work and is irritating for your partner.

Nagging commonly sets up a cycle of pushing your partner away while causing your partner to be less responsive the more you nag him.

Healthy, fulfilling relationships consist of mutual respect and understanding and a comfortable balance of give and take.

You are absolutely allowed to ask for what you want or need and to address your concerns honestly in a relationship, but it’s important to be aware of your communication and your role in the nagging cycle.

In getting what you want, a positive delivery and communication skills are vital. The way you convey your message has a lot to do with your partner’s receptiveness and willingness to listen.

Focus on using communication to come together toward collaboration while letting go of nagging tendencies in an unpleasant moment.

If you feel like you are getting heated or frustrated, take a deep breath and intentionally ground yourself before reacting. It is key to remember and understand that nagging breeds negativity and does not work.

Below are several other key tips to reduce your tendency to nag while getting your point across to your partner.

1. Create opportunities for open dialogue.

Actively listen to discuss your relationship instead of avoiding the topic, losing your temper or sounding like a broken record.

Instead of whining and saying the same thing over and over again, directly communicate your needs to your partner.

2. Take on a proactive approach.

Resist the urge to criticize him, name call or insult his character. The hope is your special guy will engage with you, listen and compromise to ensure both of your needs are being met.

“Gratitude fuels love,

happiness and positivity.”

3. Subtly train your partner.

For example, if cleanliness and organization are issues and you would like your partner to put greater effort into cleaning, show him what you would like.

This strategy is another way to come together to make the relationship better for you both.

4. Take an active role in your relationship.

Support your partner and make sure you are also doing what you want him to do.

Instead of assigning blame to him for the laundry not getting done, make sure you are on the same page about expectations (who does the laundry) and take part in getting it done.

5. Show gratitude and appreciation for him.

Be sure to say thank you and let him know you appreciate what he does while focusing on the good.

Gratitude fuels love, happiness and positivity and is a huge asset in the health of your relationship.

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