Has Online Dating Made Women Lazy Daters

Women's Dating

Has Online Dating Made Women Lazy Daters?

Bethany Heinesh

Written by: Bethany Heinesh

Bethany Heinesh

Bethany has ghost-written hundreds of dating articles in the last 10 years for relationship experts all over the United States.

Edited by: Lillian Castro

Lillian Castro

Lillian Guevara-Castro brings more than 30 years of journalism experience to ensure DatingAdvice articles have been edited for overall clarity, accuracy, and reader engagement. She has worked at The Atlanta Journal and Constitution, The Gwinnett Daily News, and The Gainesville Sun covering lifestyle topics.

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When planet Earth was making way for the age of technology, many were just fine with a pen and paper. Today, however, the use of technology is not an option, especially when it comes to dating. Like it or not, we are being inundated with revolutionary innovations in dating technology, and if we want to keep up, well, we better keep up!

Online dating, while effective and efficient, has changed the face of relationships forever. I do not believe this is necessarily a good thing, although I will acknowledge there are hundreds of thousands of happy American couples who met online. I know online dating is a great way to meet great guys, but personally, and I think many of my single girlfriends would agree, I’m afraid online dating has made us lazy.

Think about it ladies — how much effort is required to find a man online? Almost none! We post a profile, throw up a few pictures and sit back and wait. Our inbox becomes inundated with messages from men and soon we’re out on a date. Yep, this is laziness at its most basic function.

Actively pursue love.

Before online dating, women had to get out there and “play the field.” The desire to find love can be a serious motivator, and in order to meet men, we had to put ourselves out there, go places, join clubs and be visible at the gym. We would get dressed up and go out clubbing with a group of girlfriends, hoping a man might ask us to dance. We took tennis lessons from some hot guy at the country club. We took a line dancing class, hoping to meet a single guy.

We actively pursued love. We didn’t wait for some online service to find our match. You wouldn’t catch us home on a Friday or Saturday night. We were too busy out on the prowl.


“Being active in your personal life is essential to the success of your

romantic life. Stay energized by doing the things you enjoy.”

Don’t let yourself go.

Since online dating, however, we have gotten complacent. Many of us have limited ourselves by only looking online to find a mate. We no longer ask our friends to set us up or go out seeking love. We isolate ourselves, staying indoors in our pajamas to sift through thousands of online profiles, and then we feel frustrated when we don’t find someone to suit our fancy. We may even ask, “If I don’t meet a man online, where am I going to meet one?”

We also have a tendency to let ourselves go when we’re not looking for a man in conventional ways. It used to be that we wouldn’t leave the house with out a full face of makeup, every hair in place, and in our most flattering outfit. After all, we might meet Mr. Right at the grocery store. But when we begin to exclusively focus our energy toward online dating, we see no reason to get dolled up to leave the house.

Ladies, don’t get lazy! Yes, it’s true that plenty of relationships started in cyberspace, but most couples are still meeting while out and about exploring planet Earth. Being active in your personal life is essential to the success of your romantic life. Stay energized by doing the things you enjoy — go to church, take up a cause, start playing a sport or get busy with a hobby.

It is quite likely that you will meet a great guy by engaging in the activities you love, and pursuing your own interests is essential to your well-being. If you do, you’ll be a better person for it, making yourself an even greater catch, if that were even possible!

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