How Many People Should I Message Online Every Week?

Bethany Heinesh

Written by: Bethany Heinesh

Bethany Heinesh

Bethany has ghost-written hundreds of dating articles in the last 10 years for relationship experts all over the United States.

Edited by: Lillian Castro

Lillian Castro

Lillian Guevara-Castro brings more than 30 years of journalism experience to ensure DatingAdvice articles have been edited for overall clarity, accuracy, and reader engagement. She has worked at The Atlanta Journal and Constitution, The Gwinnett Daily News, and The Gainesville Sun covering lifestyle topics.

Discuss This! Discuss This!
Advertiser Disclosure

One of the things women don’t do well is juggle men. Sure, you might be Queen of the Multitask, but when it comes to love, you were naturally wired to be a one-man woman. It’s simple genetics. If you’re looking for love online, and you plan to message many guys at once to see where things go, do so with caution.

If you find five different guys you are attracted to and decide to message each of them, chances are, at least three will write you back. If you begin ongoing communication with all three, eventually you are going to want to meet them. If you meet them, you might like them all, and before you know it, you’re juggling.

At some point, monogamy will come into the equation and you’ll have to dump two. This is not only a lot of work, but it creates a situation where you will probably have to break a few hearts along the way. You certainly wouldn’t want a guy to do this to you, because it’s just not good manners, and you won’t feel good about yourself in the process. Plus, it brings bad relationship karma.

My suggestion is to find a guy you like, contact him, and then see where it goes. You’ll probably know within a week whether you want to continue communicating with this guy and set up a date or dump him and move on. If a guy doesn’t write back within three days, contact someone else. Applying this formula to your online dating life means you will only be contacting two guys in one week or seriously talking to one at a time.

Advertiser Disclosure is a free online resource that offers valuable content and comparison services to users. To keep this resource 100% free, we receive compensation from many of the offers listed on the site. Along with key review factors, this compensation may impact how and where products appear across the site (including, for example, the order in which they appear). does not include the entire universe of available offers. Editorial opinions expressed on the site are strictly our own and are not provided, endorsed, or approved by advertisers.

Our Editorial Review Policy

Our site is committed to publishing independent, accurate content guided by strict editorial guidelines. Before articles and reviews are published on our site, they undergo a thorough review process performed by a team of independent editors and subject-matter experts to ensure the content’s accuracy, timeliness, and impartiality. Our editorial team is separate and independent of our site’s advertisers, and the opinions they express on our site are their own. To read more about our team members and their editorial backgrounds, please visit our site’s About page.