How To Spice Up Your Online Dating Life

Women's Dating

How to Spice Up Your Online Dating Life

Bethany Heinesh

Written by: Bethany Heinesh

Bethany Heinesh

Bethany has ghost-written hundreds of dating articles in the last 10 years for relationship experts all over the United States.

Edited by: Lillian Castro

Lillian Castro

Lillian Guevara-Castro brings more than 30 years of journalism experience to ensure DatingAdvice articles have been edited for overall clarity, accuracy, and reader engagement. She has worked at The Atlanta Journal and Constitution, The Gwinnett Daily News, and The Gainesville Sun covering lifestyle topics.

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If you’re into online dating and you’ve been doing it for a while, your love life may begin to feel stagnant after several months. When you first join a site, you are inundated with messages from guys who are interested in you, but after a while, things have a tendency to slow down.

This is usually because in the initial stages of a paid membership, online dating sites promote you extensively to men who would be best suited for you. After you’ve been on the site for a while, they are not as eager to “put you out there” because they already have your money and a commitment for a certain length of time.

Furthermore, if you go to free online dating sites, you will be responsible for promoting yourself and scrolling through hundreds of profiles to find a decent guy. Even if you sign up on multiple sites, you will soon realize you are looking at the same guys over and over, men you have already either communicated with or dated.

You may have already rejected most of the men who have been recommended to you. Conversely, on both paid and free sites, these same men have seen you a number of times and are either not interested or you have yet to properly demonstrate what a catch you are.

After a while, you may begin to feel hopeless, like the chances of you meeting someone special are next to none. Never fear. There are a number of things you can do to revive your seemingly dying online presence and spice things up a bit. By implementing a strategy, you’ll have a Friday night booked with a dinner date in no time. Guaranteed.

1. Revamp your profile.

Take and post new pictures, rewrite your personal introduction and change up your interests. If you struggle with writing, employ the expertise of a close friend who is better at prose, and ask her to help you promote yourself in the best possible light.

Men are initially attracted to a pretty face, but it’s a great personality that keeps them coming back for more. You’re fabulous, and you just need to convince him you are fabulous.


“Be sure to research other dating sites, as there

are plenty of new sites popping up all the time.

2. Change your screen name.

This simple change can bring about an entirely new set of eyes and peak the interest of men who at one time decided you weren’t right for them. I know I speak for women everywhere when I say there have been tons of guys we ignored because they had some cheesy screen name.

I recommend choosing to include your first name in your screen name, rather than something like “Miss_Right_2012.” My screen name wherever I go is “Bethany_1212” or some other combination of the same characters. It’s like introducing myself without introducing myself.

3. Be more aggressive.

Where before you may have sat in wait and expected guys to contact you, it’s now time to take your online dating life to the next level. Send messages to men you find attractive and intriguing and introduce yourself. When you contact a new guy, be sure to appeal to his interests.

Ask him questions about his favorite book, or tell him how much you love the same music he does. When you do this, make a pact with yourself that no matter what, you won’t get discouraged if he doesn’t respond. Take it as a message from the universe that it’s not meant to be and move on to the next guy.

4. Consider building a completely new online image.

Starting from scratch is not only symbolic of a fresh start, it will put you back on the priority list of paid sites that cycle your information to men you’d likely be interested in. On free sites, the men who have already viewed your profile will think you’re the new kid on the block.

Be sure to research other dating sites, as there are plenty of new sites popping up all the time, and try sites you have never been to before. You never know what you’ll find…..or who will find you!

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