Top 10 Best Sites
Looking for a dating site you can trust? Search no more.
I tend to have sex early on when meeting a guy, and then I worry about still getting to know him or if he really will try to get to know me.
I am dating a guy now. We’ve been seeing each other for five weeks and I have made it clear from the beginning I’m not looking for anything casual. He has said we are exclusive. He also has made it clear he understands I want something real (a relationship) and he says he’s not going anywhere.
We had sex early on and still have sex. It doesn’t feel wrong and I do really feel he likes me, but we have already had arguments. I believe it’s because I’m getting attached to him on an emotional level already (mainly because of the sex).
Should I stop having sex with him and make it clear we should still get to know each other better?
I wish you had read my book “The 30-Day Love Detox” before you met this guy. It explains that having sex within 30 days of meeting someone sets you up to be broken up within one year.
It’s clear that putting the cart before the horse (sex before commitment) is making you feel insecure because the relationship is still so fragile. You can try to stop having sex with him, but it usually doesn’t work, as men tend to feel manipulated by this tactic.
All you can do is to work on containing yourself and try not to get too clingy.
Also, it is imperative you talk to him about your feelings.
Let him know you had sex with him earlier than you would have liked because you are so attracted to him. Then explain your perfect female biology creates oxytocin during sex that is the female bonding hormone.
Tell him you understand men fall in love slower and need to really trust someone first. Then continue to show him you are trustworthy, kind and healthy – all things men are attracted to.
If he’s really a commitment-oriented guy who is not emotionally avoidant, he’ll be able to handle your emotional communication. If he dismisses you, then you need to ask yourself if he’s the one for you.
When we have early sex, the pleasure centers of the brain are stimulated by so many neurotransmitters and hormones that it is very difficult to make a clear decision about love.
It’s love’s big delusion. Only time will tell if this is the real deal.
No counseling or psychotherapy advice: The Site does not provide psychotherapy advice. The Site is intended only for use by consumers in search of general information of interest pertaining to problems people may face as individuals and in relationships and related topics. Content is not intended to replace or serve as substitute for professional consultation or service. Contained observations and opinions should not be misconstrued as specific counseling advice.
DatingAdvice.com is a free online resource that offers valuable content and comparison services to users. To keep this resource 100% free, we receive compensation from many of the offers listed on the site. Along with key review factors, this compensation may impact how and where products appear across the site (including, for example, the order in which they appear). DatingAdvice.com does not include the entire universe of available offers. Editorial opinions expressed on the site are strictly our own and are not provided, endorsed, or approved by advertisers.
Our site is committed to publishing independent, accurate content guided by strict editorial guidelines. Before articles and reviews are published on our site, they undergo a thorough review process performed by a team of independent editors and subject-matter experts to ensure the content’s accuracy, timeliness, and impartiality. Our editorial team is separate and independent of our site’s advertisers, and the opinions they express on our site are their own. To read more about our team members and their editorial backgrounds, please visit our site’s About page.