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If you’re a senior single introvert, your idea of a fun evening may entail cuddling with your dog and binge watching Netflix. There’s nothing wrong with that. However, when you want companionship and romance, you’ll need to get out of your comfort zone every now and then.
You can remain authentic to your introverted self while also interacting with new people on a regular basis. Read on to discover nine dating strategies that will lead you to love at midlife.
As an introvert, your most natural tendency may be to select one senior dating strategy and focus exclusively on that. However, the strategies in this article all dovetail well together, creating more synchronicity when combined than when pursued one at a time.
Adapt these strategies to suit your authentic self regardless of the type of introvert you are. Select two at a time to experiment with. Get comfortable with your dating style. Then select another strategy to add to your dating habits.
You’ll want to use senior dating sites and apps to efficiently put yourself out there. You can avoid the uncomfortable experience of breaking the ice with strangers at a bar. Dating sites and apps are shortcuts to finding available and interested senior singles.
Be sure to post great photos that are only focused on you. No group shots. Show off your shy smile and your inner self to attract a senior mate. A well-crafted profile also includes personal information, including some of your hobbies. However, don’t just cite your hobbies in generalized terms. Instead, be sure to include specifics that your prospective date can ask you more about during your pre-first date messaging.
In addition to going online to find senior romance, make use of your extroverted friends who often host parties and other activities. Become a mainstay in their social circle by attending every event they invite you to.
Then ask them if they can invite some other single seniors to introduce you to. Help your friends make the connection as smooth as possible by sharing some fun tidbits about yourself. Maybe you’re a great cook and you bring a go-to dish to each party as a conversation starter. Or maybe you’re passionate about wine and can tell the other guests some cool facts about the bottle you brought along with you.
Stay in touch with any former extroverted girlfriends or boyfriends. These are precisely the people who have a vibrant and ever-expanding social circle. Cultivate these connections.
Your ex’s dinner parties and soirees are great places for casually meeting new love interests without the pressure of it being a true blind date. And don’t fret that you’re being a burden or obligation to your exes. If you’re on good terms, then they won’t mind helping you out.
The world often mistakes introverts as having social anxiety or being uncomfortable speaking, but that’s not true.
According to Myers-Briggs, introverts process internally, while extroverts need to talk to process their thoughts and feelings. Introverts definitely enjoy talking. They just need to find the right topics on which they’d enjoy conversing.
Introverts often require more small talk warmups before getting into deep conversations. Their privacy instinct means they’re not going to open up to just anyone and certainly not on the first senior date.
By asking your date to “tell me more about that,” you’re participating in the conversation while turning it back to the extrovert, who is often more comfortable chatting with strangers. “Tell me more about that” gives you something authentic to say without absconding with your responsibility to assist in carrying the conversation.
Be careful, though, not to lean on your excellent listening skills and let the extrovert just talk and talk and talk. Many extroverts are vetting your ability to engage in conversation. If you drop the dialogue exchange ball, leaving all the heavy lifting up to the extrovert, you may never form a real connection.
You can also be upfront about your shyness: “I’m really enjoying getting to know you, Jessica. Just to let you know, it takes me a few dates to be comfortable sharing more of myself with someone new.” And then feel free to insert a genuine compliment: “I’m enjoying discovering who you are. Tell me more about your love for…”
Most people love dogs. When you walk your dog around your neighborhood or take him or her to a dog park, you will attract other people easily. They’ll admire your dog and ask you questions, and breaking the ice becomes a nonissue.
You won’t have to scramble for what to say. You can just respond naturally and tell them all about your darling dog. Then graciously ask them a few questions about their pet.
Introverts often prefer to rely on a few memorized sentences and conversation topics, and that’s OK. Having a mental guide can help you get started.
Literally write out three small-talk questions you can utter in a handful of social scenarios in which you may find yourself.
Let’s take it back to your dog. For example, the conversation could go like this:
When you go out, make it easy for others to break the ice with you by always carrying something in your hand.
If you make it easy for the extroverts to break the ice, they often will. On the flip side, if you carry just the right prop, a fellow introvert may ask you about it if it’s a common interest.
For example, you can carry a book with a large print and clear font title on the cover. Ideally, select a book with a fun and inviting photo and title that attracts attention and responses.
By weaving together a combination of these nine senior dating strategies for introverts, you can remain authentic to your temperament while seeking love after 50.