As online dating sites become more and more popular, the tendency to fib, lie or create a profile designed for the way you’ve aspired to be has become more common than those who believe in truth in advertising.
As an online dating expert and coach, this truly troubles me. I’ve made a point of twisting arms and arguing with singles to be authentic.
After all, won’t you want your dream dates to be telling you the truth about their marital status, job, age and where they went to college?
According to a U.K. survey conducted by vouchercodespro.com of 3,000 singles, more than 50 percent of both men and women were lying in their Internet dating profiles.
“I have to lie about my age,” said 42-year-old Samantha. “If I say I’m really 42, the men will think I’m 50.”
I disagree with the “everyone else does it” theory.
If every kid in town went shoplifting, would that make it appropriate for you to break the law and do so as well?
Where do you draw the line as single daters between fibbing a few years about your age and saying you don’t have children when there are two little mouths to feed?
If you were caught lying on your resume or Linkedin profile while looking for a job, the hiring manager would flag it and you wouldn’t be considered for your dream job.
The same holds true for online dating. Authenticity and confidence in both men and women are the ultimate aphrodisiac.
Being genuine is as sexy as it can get, regardless of what number appears on the scale during your morning weigh-in.
“More than half of the singles
worldwide believe lying is fine.”
Why do singles believe it’s OK to lie online?
In the crowded playground of Internet dating, it’s important to stand out. Singles live in fear that they won’t show up in a search when a big birthday rolls around.
The fact that people don’t think they’re doing anything wrong by posting photos that are 10 years old or taking a decade off their weight shows the level of insecurity that singles are struggling with.
I’m here to tell you there are plenty of age-appropriate singles looking for someone to share their lives with.
When someone’s profile says they’re looking for someone honest, funny and smart, are they also representing themselves accurately? Not always.
Short of doing a background check on someone, or conducting a Google search for their email and cell phone number, you really don’t know the truth about who is writing to you online.
Sure you can hop over to Facebook to see if their latest “selfie” looks like their online dating profile photos and upload their profile picture to Google image search to see where they went to school and what charities they might have supported, but until you get to know someone, you’re getting the best image of how they want to portray themselves.
Unfortunately, more than half of the singles worldwide believe lying is fine.
I encourage all singles to be authentic. Don’t let your dream date walk out on you when they find out about one small lie. In his or her mind, they’re thinking about what else you could be hiding.
Keep it genuine and make it real.
