Am I Wasting My Time, or Should I Stick it Out and See What Happens?

Am I Wasting My Time With This Girl
Updated:
Dr. Wendy Walsh
Lillian Castro

By: Dr. Wendy Walsh

Editor: Lillian Castro

Our dating experts guide readers step-by-step through relationship challenges and romantic decisions in our popular series of advice articles.

Reader Question:

I met this girl a month ago and we’ve been talking and going out as much as we can. The catch is that she still has a boyfriend. She has told me she doesn’t want to be with him and he doesn’t treat her the right way. She has told me she wants to be with me.

Currently, she lives at his house, and I currently live with my parents. If she leaves him, then she won’t have anywhere to stay. I just don’t feel like she really does want to be with me. Her current boyfriend gets mad when she’s not home by a certain time, and it gives us almost no time to really do anything. But she always talks about how much better I make her feel.

I just don’t know if I am wasting my time with this girl, or if I should just stick it out and see what happens?

-Ryan D. (California)

Dr. Wendy Walsh’s Answer:

I want you to think long and hard about if you really want to fall in love with a cheater. The woman is betraying a trust with the dude who is putting a roof over her head. And you should be concerned about his reaction if he finds out she’s been “seeing” you. Once a cheater, most often always a cheater. I don’t care how hot this girl is, run! It’s only a matter of time before she’ll be unfaithful to you.


No counseling or psychotherapy advice: The Site does not provide psychotherapy advice. The Site is intended only for use by consumers in search of general information of interest pertaining to problems people may face as individuals and in relationships and related topics. Content is not intended to replace or serve as substitute for professional consultation or service. Contained observations and opinions should not be misconstrued as specific counseling advice.

About the Author

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Dr. Wendy Walsh

By: Dr. Wendy Walsh

Women's Dating Expert

Known as America's Relationship Expert, Dr. Wendy Walsh is an award-winning television journalist, radio host & podcaster, and the author of three books on relationships and thousands of print and digital articles. More than 1.5 million people follow her sage advice on social media. She holds a Ph.D. in Clinical Psychology and teaches in the Psychology Department at California State University Channel Islands and has been the host of "The Dr. Wendy Walsh Show" on iHeart Radio's KFI AM 640 since 2015. Walsh is also a former Emmy-nominated co-host of "The Doctors," as well as former host of the nationally syndicated show "EXTRA." She was named a Time Magazine Person of the Year in 2017 after speaking out about harassment at a major news network.

See Dr. Wendy's full bio »

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