Group Dates: Good Idea or Mojo Killer?

The informal definition of a “date” is a social or romantic engagement. Though it doesn’t mention how many people constitute a date, it’s usually understood that number is two. So why would we make dating even more difficult by adding others to the mix?

For some, it’s a safety blanket to have friends around. For others, it’s a chance to organize a night out with a bunch of potential mates. Group dating is most popular in Japan, where it is known as gokon. A gokon is when two groups of eligible men and women meet at a public place to get to know each other better. Let’s take a look at the pros and cons of group dating, whether it’s Japan, America or anywhere else in the world.

If you’re unsure of a potential mate, group dating is gaining popularity as a safe alternative to single dating, especially blind dating. Having your friends around will help ease tension. Plan for a group of eligible men and women to meet for happy hour and find out what happens. Spending time with multiple potential dates improves your odds of finding Miss Right.

“Holding hands in a dark movie

theater was cool when you were 12.”

There are a few things to contemplate when planning or attending a group date. Choose your friends carefully. You will be judged based on the friends you bring along. And vice versa. Hate to say i, but it’s true. Bring your real friends — those you can trust to help you make a yay or nay decision. Nerves aside, try and be yourself!

After choosing the participants for a group date, it’s time to choose the activity. Some good ideas are riding go-karts, going to a baseball game or other sporting event, or organizing a picnic or a bon fire. Keep the date loose and fun, but also give people the chance to get to know each other. Avoid a movie or concert where talking is frowned upon.

If you’re really looking to get to know someone, then group dates should be left in middle school. Holding hands in a dark movie theater while 10 of your friends are sitting around was cool when you were 12. Now, a date date should consist of two people. Add a nice restaurant, some wine and maybe even an end-of-the-evening kiss and you’ve got yourself a proper date.