If You Like Someone, You Should Take a Risk. Am I Right?

Gina Stewart

Written by: Gina Stewart

Gina Stewart

Gina is the owner of Expert Online Dating. As an online dating consultant, she helps men and women maximize their online dating experiences to get more dates. You can visit her website, www.ExpertOnlineDating.com, for more information or to contact her.

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Edited by: Lillian Castro

Lillian Castro

Lillian Guevara-Castro brings more than 30 years of journalism experience to ensure DatingAdvice articles have been edited for overall clarity, accuracy, and reader engagement. She has worked at The Atlanta Journal and Constitution, The Gwinnett Daily News, and The Gainesville Sun covering lifestyle topics.

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Reader Question:

I met this girl at a show a couple of months ago. She said she had just gotten out of a relationship and wasn’t ready for one, which was fine at the time.

Two months later…we have sex often. We act like we’re a couple. Everything seems to be going perfectly.

I brought up the subject and she tells me she is still not ready for a serious relationship. We ended up in a slight argument about why she’s not ready for a relationship.

I don’t want to waste my time and end up getting hurt over it, but I like her a lot and I’m not sure if I’ve ever liked a woman this much before.

If you really like someone enough, you would take the risk. Am I right?

-Matt (California)

Gina Stewart’s Answer:

Let’s face it, this situation sucks because even if you choose to leave, your heart still gets broken.

Based on the fact, let’s try to take this from her perspective because if anything is going to get you anywhere here, it’s empathy.

Sometimes it is hard for a person to move from one serious relationship to another in a short time, even if they like the new person a ton.

It sounds like that’s where she’s at. She likes you enough to do all the elements of a relationship but no labeling or acknowledgment of it.

Ask her what it will take for her to know that she wants to be in a serious relationship, how you can help her get there and how she wants you guys to be in the meantime. Then see if you can’t find some common ground.

If she feels like you are on her side, and a partner to her before you’re technically “partners,” she may not feel so inclined to counter your feelings and you may find yourself with a girlfriend.

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