My Husband is in a Relationship. What Should I Do?

Dr. Wendy Walsh

Written by: Dr. Wendy Walsh

Dr. Wendy Walsh

Dr. Wendy Walsh is the author of "The 30-Day Love Detox"" (April 2013).

Edited by: Lillian Castro

Lillian Castro

Lillian Guevara-Castro brings more than 30 years of journalism experience to ensure DatingAdvice articles have been edited for overall clarity, accuracy, and reader engagement. She has worked at The Atlanta Journal and Constitution, The Gwinnett Daily News, and The Gainesville Sun covering lifestyle topics.

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Reader Question:

My husband and I have been married for nine years, and all of a sudden he is in a relationship. He said he still loves me and said we should take this one day at a time, but we are still married. He said he does not want a divorce. What should I do?

Signed confused,

-Kim M. (California)

Dr. Wendy Walsh’s Answer:

Wow! You’ve just been handed one of life’s giant crisis. The question is, can you turn this into an opportunity? This could be a wake-up call for your marriage that helps the two of you get past this crisis through intimate communication, forgiveness and deeper intimacy. Or it could be the first step toward divorce court.

One thing I know for sure, if you remain passive and tolerant, you’ll enter a slippery slope toward separation. If you really love your husband, I say, fight for your marriage. Take a stand. Give him an ultimatum that he must leave the other woman and enter couples counseling with you. If he refuses, then you have a big decision to make. Are you woman enough to get the love you deserve?

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