Survey: More Than Half of Singles Think Cost Splitting is the New Normal on Dates

For singles, a pivotal moment on a first date isn’t always the initial meeting, conversation, or possible kiss at the end of the night; it’s what their date does when the check comes at the end of a meal. Whether it’s a meal, movie tickets, or a cup of coffee, men in heterosexual relationships have traditionally been expected to foot the bill for women on dates, especially first dates. 

Is this tradition dead? How do LGBTQ+ couples handle dating costs? A survey of more than 950 single Americans finds shifting perceptions of how finances should be handled while on a date. The growing trend is that more than half (53%) of singles feel splitting the bill evenly is the new normal for first dates. 

Roughly 1 in 3 (35%) singles surveyed think it’s outdated to have one person cover the entire cost of a first date. Interestingly, that perception is generally the same across generations — except for Gen X. Only 21% of Gen Xers polled feel it is outdated to have someone cover the cost of a first date. 

In 2024, more than half of the singles surveyed paid the entire bill on a first date. That statistic was significantly higher among survey respondents who identified as straight men (82%). 

Nearly 2 in 5 (39%) singles said they split the bill while out on a first date in 2024. More LGBTQ+ singles surveyed (48%) than straight couples (37%) say they have done this. Despite 60% of Americans saying they do not expect their date to pay for them both, the way the bill was handled has led some to deny a second date. 

The main reason for this? Nearly a third (30%) said their date didn’t tip well or at all! Others said they turned down a future meetup because their date had them split the bill or had them pay the whole bill. 

Relationship expert and psychologist, Dr. Wendy Walsh recommends that whoever extends the invitation for a date should be the one who pays the bill. Dr. Wendy surveyed 100 actively dating men for her book “The Girlfriend Test” and learned that a woman paying for a man on a date isn’t always attractive.

“I asked them what it means if a woman offers to pay part of the check on a first date,” she told us. “Almost all of them said it sends the message that she is not sexually attracted to them and doesn’t want to feel she owes them anything.”

When it comes time to pay the bill, the main reason singles prefer to split it is fairness. Nearly half (45%) also say splitting the bill makes the date feel less transactional, and 28% say it helps avoid awkwardness. As for how the bill is split, survey respondents are torn on the best way to do it.

Slightly more than half of the singles surveyed (54%) shared they prefer to split the bill evenly (straight down the middle), while 46% prefer to split the bill based on what each person had to eat or drink. That may also avoid the awkwardness of feeling you’re paying for more food and drinks than you had. 

Nearly 1 in 4 (22%) singles said they have felt taken advantage of financially during a first date, and 29% said dates have split the bill evenly despite ordering more food or drinks. 

At the night’s end, over 1 in 3 (34%) of singles surveyed have gone on a first date where the bill exceeded their expected budget. Americans feel paying an average of $117 or more for a first date is too much to ask one person to pay. 

Although singles feel the trend of splitting the bill on a first date is becoming more commonplace, many unspoken expectations still influence these decisions. 

More than half of straight men surveyed said they feel pressure to pay the entire bill on the first date, and 45% said they feel guilty if they don’t. Approximately  3 in 5 (61%) straight men have paid the bill to make a good impression, and 62% paid it out of politeness. 

As for women, 30% said they split the bill to show independence. Despite that, 60% of straight women said they assume their date will cover the cost of a first date, and 35% said it’s very important to them who covers the bill. 

While splitting the bill on the first date is becoming more common, there are still strong expectations rooted in tradition among singles, especially heterosexual singles, about who will pay for a first date. Whether you split the bill, pay it all, or have it paid for, remember to treat your date respectfully and have a good time. Dating is meant to be fun! 

In July 2024, we surveyed 963 single, divorced, or widowed Americans about their dating experiences and preferences. Of these, 49% were men, 48% were women, and 3% were nonbinary. Seventy-seven percent identified as straight, 14% as bisexual, 4% as other, 3% as gay, and 2% as lesbian. Respondents ranged in age from 18 to 77, with an average age of 38. 

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