By now you’ve probably tried Tinder. It can be extremely frustrating. Swipe, after swipe, after swipe… A lot of people use it to hook up. If you’re DTF, then that’s cool. But you also can use it to find a girlfriend. You just have to be smart and, of course, patient.
Sick of not having any luck on Tinder? Responsible for more dates, relationships, and marriages than any dating site or app, Match.com is another good option!
As you know, meeting people in the digital world takes time and is usually disappointing. The first thing you have to do is adjust your mindset. You’re going to fail more often than succeed. Keep an open mind. More importantly, keep your eyes open. If she offers her Facebook page, check it out. You can tell a lot (what she really looks like!)
The best part about Tinder is its low impact
You don’t have to spend hours writing emails and profiles. Women know not every single guy is a poet and are more willing to give you a chance as long as you come off as a genuine human being.
Many popular dating sites require a good bit of personal information, asking you about yourself and what you are looking for and any dealbreakers you may have.
That sends thoughts running through their female brains of a partner in crime or kissing frogs to find a prince (we’ve all read those profiles.)
But what women really want is to:
- Actually be attracted to the guy who shows up
- Like him enough to want to see him again
- Have him not be some psycho, stalker, weirdo
If you do those three things, you’ll be 10% better than 90% of the guys out there, and you’ll probably get some action.
Tinder is set up exactly like gambling. There’s a picture of a woman. She writes one or two little teasing words. She says no hook up.
Of course, when you read no hook up, you know in your male mind she actually does want to hook up, but she doesn’t want to validate that because she actually wants to get laid.
And you hope, wait, hope and wait this beauty will get back to you. She doesn’t, so what do you do?
You go back on Tinder. It’s on your mobile phone. You can Tinder anywhere you want!
You get back on, and you continually get nothing in your inbox – nothing at all.
But yet you go back and you’ve heard from friends they’ve actually gotten laid from Tinder. So you keep going and going and going.
How do you make Tinder a success? Here’s a couple of quick tips to make Tinder more successful.
1. Swipe right every single time
No questions. No exceptions. Expect nothing. Whatever you get is a bonus.
If you really want to succeed in the Tinder swipe game, you need to do a few things differently. For one, have lower expectations and give new matches a little leeway early on. Even if the photo isn’t your ideal vision of a woman, swipe right to see if there’s more than meets the eye.
2. Write something catchy in your profile
Just something catchy. I write “international entrepreneur.”
What I would do is write down one positive amazing trait about you that sets you apart.
I’m killer at Scrabble. I have the skills of a ninja warrior when it comes down to negotiating the price of a car.
Pick something that will intrigue her — because most guys don’t write anything. Not only that, but you have to have a catchy screen name if you aren’t using your full name!
You also can always write…
3. Not looking for hook up
Women have been trained by their experience in the dating world to be wary of guys who are all about sex. If you say you’re “not looking for a casual hookup,” you’ll attract more women who appreciate that you’re not only online for some ass.
As backward as it may sound, she’s probably much more likely to have sex with you in the scenario where you say hooking up isn’t your top priority. No girl wants to read a Tinder profile and feel like she’s only a conquest or a notch on a bedpost. So keep the sex talk out of it early on and let that part unfold naturally.
4. Get back to her the minute you get a phone number
Get the conversation rolling right away. Don’t text something vague or bland like “Hi, how are you?”
Write something clever like “Hey, I checked out your dating profile. You look like a girl who knows what she wants. If you’re not doing anything spectacular this weekend, I strongly suggest we have a magical ‘boy meets girl’ moment :).”
It will spark her interest and show that you’re not afraid to put yourself on the line for her.
Take a chance. Be different. Stand out from the crowd because you can be sure there’s a crowd of guys texting her. If she suddenly stops texting, send her a friendly nudge like “Oh hey, did we break up already? These Tinder relationships are brutal.” Don’t come off as needy or blame her for not responding at lightning speed. Keep things light, and know when to let go if she’s not into it.
Make Tinder work for you. Have fun. And remember — set realistic expectations!
