Do You Feel Worthless In Your Relationship

Women's Dating

Do You Feel Worthless in Your Relationship?

Lynn Gilliard

Written by: Lynn Gilliard

Lynn Gilliard

Lynn Gilliard is the author of "Friends with Benefits SUCKS (At Least for Women)" and the relationship guide "Let Him Chase YOU." Visit her blog at for more insights.

Edited by: Lillian Castro

Lillian Castro

Lillian Guevara-Castro brings more than 30 years of journalism experience to ensure DatingAdvice articles have been edited for overall clarity, accuracy, and reader engagement. She has worked at The Atlanta Journal and Constitution, The Gwinnett Daily News, and The Gainesville Sun covering lifestyle topics.

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Since I was a child, I have struggled with feelings of not being worthy, not being enough and not really mattering.

It got to the point where I could not understand why I was even put on this earth.

I then went through a period after I flourished into a beautiful woman and started to get everything I wanted. I was accepted into a top college. I had plenty of boyfriends, a great job and a full social life.

Unfortunately, those old feelings did not go away.

They extended into my adulthood.

I did not even fully realize it until I went through a very difficult experience and sunk into a deep depression.

I looked back at my life and could not identify one exceptional accomplishment I had achieved, such as becoming wealthy or settling down with a wonderful man.

Suddenly, I was really sad again.

It was only after a whole lot of soul searching and listening to motivational tapes that I identified the root cause of this sadness and managed to pull myself out of it.

How does this thought process affect relationships?

Do you ever feel like you do not really matter? Do you feel like the world does not need you?

If so, how do you think these feelings are affecting your ability to establish and build a successful, loving relationship with someone else?

As I discuss in my forthcoming relationship guide, until you have true love for yourself and you exhibit self-confidence, it is going to be very difficult, if not impossible, to meet the man of your dreams and allow him into your heart.

“Until you defeat those enemy troops,

no one is going to get into your heart.”

Think of those thoughts of worthlessness as an army of enemy forces marching around your heart, day in and out. Even if you were to meet a great guy, he is going to have a hard time getting in.

Even if he does manage to get in while the enemy is sleeping, those negative beliefs will eventually wake up and drag him right back out of your life.

Until you defeat and destroy those enemy troops marching around your heart, telling you that you are not worthy of love, no one is going to be able to get into your heart in any real way.

It’s difficult to defeat feelings of worthlessness.

This is especially true when you have had them since childhood, but it can be done.

It starts with awareness that those enemy forces are still present in your life.

The next step is building up your self-confidence so you can destroy them permanently. Stay tuned for more insights into how to do this.

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