I have been on the single scene for 12 years and have met my fair share of men I am not interested in. I am often asked for advice from women who find themselves suddenly single.
I think the most common question I get asked today is: Why is the guy I’m seeing ignoring me all of sudden?
I like to call this playing dead
I am just as mystified as everyone else when men do this. Surely if they are not interested, they would just say so. It does not seem like a difficult thing to do. But then again, maybe I have unrealistic expectations.
Either way, I researched playing dead to help understand this annoying behavior. One reason for animals to play dead is because they want to avoid unwanted attention.
I hate to say it, but that is the brutal reality of the situation. If he is not calling me, he does not want any attention from me.
However, I guarantee you he wants a lot of attention from a different girl. This is a true story.
I was recently given some ridiculous advice about men
The advice was I need to smell like vanilla because men like that.
I highly doubt smelling like a sponge cake will solve any playing dead problems I might experience in the future. Besides, I like to think men are interested in me for better reasons than whether I smell like custard or not.
I hate these situations. They are terrible. The worst thing I could do is attempt to turn things around.
The more I try, the worse I end up feeling because I prolong the inevitable. I know in the pit of my stomach he is ignoring me, regardless of how many times I try to tell myself he is just busy.
“I’m not about to read up on guerrilla warfare wooing
tactics to convince a guy I’m what he wants.”
It is far from a great feeling.
It does not hurt because I actually liked him but because my ego took a little blow.
I am prepared to leave the vanilla essence on the supermarket shelf rather than sprinkle it on to woo someone. I am equally prepared to delete his number before my ego is completely shattered.
I do not imagine my vanilla-scented acquaintance would react the same way. She may start to wonder what other techniques she can incorporate into her routine to make him stick around.
I am not about to read up on guerrilla warfare wooing tactics in an attempt to convince a guy I am what he wants. Why would I make such a huge effort to keep someone around who has only made me miserable?
I chose to walk away. I prefer that to smelling like a cheesecake any day.
