How To Get To Know A Girl You Like

Men's Dating

How to Get to Know a Girl You Like

Bethany Heinesh

Written by: Bethany Heinesh

Bethany Heinesh

Bethany has ghost-written hundreds of dating articles in the last 10 years for relationship experts all over the United States.

Edited by: Lillian Castro

Lillian Castro

Lillian Guevara-Castro brings more than 30 years of journalism experience to ensure DatingAdvice articles have been edited for overall clarity, accuracy, and reader engagement. She has worked at The Atlanta Journal and Constitution, The Gwinnett Daily News, and The Gainesville Sun covering lifestyle topics.

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If you’ve set your sights on a hot mamacita you’ve met while out around town, or you just became aware you’re falling for your study buddy, or you notice a chick in the gym whose hard work is starting to pay off, getting to know a girl you like is as easy as breathing. It’s effortless.

The most challenging part about meeting women you find attractive is meeting women you find attractive. In addition to meeting women online through matchmaking sites, you really have to put yourself out there and create situations where you might actually connect with a woman you’re into.

If you’ve met someone special, good for you. Like the great American hero G.I. Joe told you so many years ago — when you were just a young lad whose only care in the world was Skeletor — knowing is half the battle. If you happen to know a girl you like, you’re halfway there. Getting to know her, talking with her, wowing her with your wit and intellect, and securing a date is the second half, and that’s the really fun part.

Women want to be noticed.

I know this will come as a complete shock, but most women are dying to be noticed, acknowledged or talked to in some way. We love it when men strike up conversations with us. It makes us feel special and important. Even if we are already dating someone or find you completely hideous to look at, we want your attention.

Too often, men are guilty of overanalyzing what women want and spend way too much time thinking about what to say instead of just saying something. It really doesn’t take much to impress us when it comes to the getting-to-know-each-other phase of dating.

I know it can be difficult for some guys to break through the shyness barrier, and I want to be the kind of gal who encourages all of you to be bold about talking to the women of the world.

Sure, there will be times when you get rejected, but I’d be willing to bet that more times than not, women will react to you in unimaginable ways when you step out and take a chance. Stop worrying about looking foolish and take a risk at looking foolish. Most women will be polite and receptive, even if they are not interested.


“Ask for the time, ask for directions, comment on some

shared experience, or ask questions about anything.

Soon, you’ll see that talking to girls won’t kill you.”

Start talking.

Want to get to know a girl you like? Walk right on over and start talking. It’s that simple. Of course, you want to play it cool, and by that I mean don’t go running up to her all excited, blurting out, “Hi, my name is Roy and I like peas!” (Yes, it happened to me.)

Approach her calmly, confidently and with a certain swagger. Look her right in the eyes, introduce yourself and strike up a conversation. Corny pickup lines are not off limits and often serve as the perfect icebreaker. “I was going to come up and ask you what time it is only because I knew it was time to meet you. Hello, I am Roy, but my friends call me Roy.”

Introductions are so much easier than you think, and once you’ve established that initial communication, the rest is downhill. Now all you have to do is get a phone number, a name to find her on Facebook, an email address — some way to continue the conversation in a more private setting. Contact her later and invite her for a night out.

When you’re alone together and the situation becomes more conducive to intimate discussion, you’ll be better equipped to get to know more about her by asking questions and exchanging life stories. Here’s another thing I bet you didn’t know about women — we love to talk. If you ask us halfway decent questions, we’ll gab all night.

If the thought of talking to the girl you like makes you want to retreat and hide under the covers, take baby steps. Practice talking to women in public places by initiating meaningless, random, quick interactions. Ask for the time, ask for directions, comment on some shared experience, or ask questions about anything. Soon, you’ll see that talking to girls won’t kill you. It’ll only make you stronger and better equipped to approach the object of your affection. When you feel ready, go for it.

And that, my friend, is how you get to know a girl you like.

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