It’s Hard to Be Myself. How Can She See My Personality?

Dr. Wendy Walsh

Written by: Dr. Wendy Walsh

Dr. Wendy Walsh

Dr. Wendy Walsh is the author of "The 30-Day Love Detox"" (April 2013).

Edited by: Lillian Castro

Lillian Castro

Lillian Guevara-Castro brings more than 30 years of journalism experience to ensure DatingAdvice articles and reports have been edited for overall clarity, accuracy, and reader engagement.

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Reader Question:

There is a girl I met almost three years ago now. We dated for a brief time when we met. Then things went south because I got a little crazy, mostly due to going through one of the hardest times in my life. We still keep in contact and will hang out a few times a year.

When we do hang out, I find it hard to act myself around her because I like her so much. What advice do you have for me to not only get to know her better, but to allow her to see my true personality?

-James (Texas)

Dr. Wendy Walsh’s Answer:

James, what does “I got a little crazy” mean? The answer to that question is important. If your “craziness” involved violence, betrayal, stalking, drug use, lying or other immoral behavior, then you’re going to have a really hard time earning this young woman’s trust again.

My advice to you: Be honest, steady, kind (but not intrusive) and respectful. Try to stop worrying about acting like your true personality and simply be yourself. Imagine that she will accept your true personality and it’ll be easier to relax.

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