The Jewish Matchmaker Who Transforms Your Love Life Into A Romantic Comedy

The Short Version: Matchmaker Jessica Fass gives her clients a movie star makeover in order to raise their confidence, renew their faith in love, and match them up with the person of their dreams. The founder of Jewish matchmaking service Fass Pass to Love, Jessica specializes in transforming secular and conservative Jewish singles alike into the heroes of their own personal rom-coms.

True love never feels more attainable than within the four walls of a movie theater, with popcorn in one hand and a box of tissues in the other. But when the credits roll, doubt can also start to creep in. When will the man or woman of your dreams fall out of the sky? Where’s your cinematic love story? 

Matchmaker Jessica Fass was dazzled by the swoon-worthy couples in classic rom-coms, but she knew real love was far more mysterious — and rare — than a 90-minute flick makes it seem. As the founder of Fass Pass to Love, Jessica specializes in transforming Jewish singles into the heroes of their own personal rom-coms. 

“I tell this to my clients: You’re starring in your own romantic comedy, and it wouldn’t be a good movie if the two leads are together from the beginning, if there’s no conflict and you don’t have to work for it,” Jessica told us. 

As a Jewish woman who has experienced both sides of the matchmaking process, Jessica understands how Jewish singles contend with religious and cultural differences. Romanticizing the matchmaking process by giving clients a rom-com-like makeover can bring levity, promote confidence, and open their minds to new experiences. 

Clients may bring different backgrounds, values, and cultural identities to the table, but Jessica makes sure they leave with the tools they need to find lasting love — no cheesy love songs required (though certainly encouraged).

Born and raised in L.A., it was Jessica’s time spent living in Tel Aviv that strengthened her connection with her cultural roots. It’s where Fass Pass to Love was born. 

“Living in Israel makes me unique,” she told us. “(So does) the fact that I have people on my team that are all international Jews as well … We understand all the religious levels and all the mentalities.”

Jessica brings a wide scope of experience to matchmaking, from her secular Jewish upbringing to her time in the culturally traditional Tel Aviv. She mainly works with people who identify with secular, reform, and conservative Judaism — what she calls “lighter levels of observance.” 

Jessica created Fass Pass to Love so she could help Jewish singles live their real-life rom-com fantasies, a dream born out of her own experience as a single woman looking for love. “I got married at 40. I will always know what it’s like to be single later. I’m not someone who got married at 25 and doesn’t know the struggle,” she said. 

Anyone looking to work with Fass Pass to Love can rest easy knowing that matchmakers are fully certified. Jessica has worked with the best of the best, including on the Netflix show “Jewish Matchmaking,” where she worked as a Consulting Producer.

Matchmakers give clients a movie-star makeover complete with a professional photo shoot.

Potential clients will receive a call from Fass Pass’ Director of Client Relations — Lori Fass, Jessica’s mother. She’s not only Jessica’s mother and business partner, but a dating coach in her own right. She’ll pop in from time to time to offer sage advice. Even Jessica’s husband, Brian, lends a hand by writing VIP Client Profiles. He also provides a male perspective of the dating world.

And when it comes time for the matchmaking process to begin, Jessica takes her clients through a unique process: a complete head-to-toe makeover. “Everybody gets a dedicated relationship coach and a dedicated matchmaker,” she told us. “And we do fashion styling, depending on which package (the client chooses).”

Stylists can also help clients improve their hairstyle and give men facial hair advice. The makeover culminates in every rom-com fan’s dream come true. “(Clients) get a professional photo shoot,” Jessica revealed. 

The makeover process may sound intimidating, but the point isn’t for you to change your entire personality. “It’s just like a 2.0 version of you,” Jessica said. “I really feel like I’ve made it like a romantic comedy.” 

The amount of coaching a client receives depends on where the client is in their individual dating journey — and if they’re truly prepared for the demands of matchmaking. 

“The people that fight us don’t listen to us. They’re not as happy at the end because they don’t see the transformation. They weren’t doing the work.” This, Jessica told us, is why Fass Pass to Love considers the ideal client to be someone who is ready for change.

“The ideal clients that are the best fit for us are 20s-40s, never married, no kids, but they want marriage and kids. Or maybe they are divorced with one kid, and they want more,” Jessica said. “I’ve had clients like in their 50s or 60s that just want a Jewish partner, but they’ve already had their kids and so they just want that companion.” 

When it comes to the ideal client, what really matters is how receptive they are to feedback — from the matchmakers and dating coaches, but also from their dates. 

“We call everyone up after the first three dates with a new match [and ask for feedback]. If you get three types of feedback that are similar about you from three different people, that’s when we’re like, OK, maybe there’s something to work on here,” Jessica told us. 

The feedback may be difficult to hear, but it could reveal a previously unknown habit that is preventing you from making a lasting connection. “It’s not just one person’s opinion … You can’t improve unless you get feedback,” Jessica said. 

But for Jewish singles, it’s equally important to know exactly what you’re looking for in terms of religious observance. 

“Sometimes people are confused about what level of Judaism they want to be,” Jessica said. “They thought they could be with someone less or more, and then they realize they can’t.” 

She advises her clients to focus on their own values, which should make it easier to choose a partner with similar values. “The people that are too wide, we get them to focus more. The people that are too narrow — ‘I only want this age, this height, and this exact political level and level of Judaism’ — have to open that, because that’s why you’re single.”

Opening one’s worldview is the key to finding lasting love, Jessica told us. “My biggest tip for singles of any religion, of any background, is to be open-minded to people that are against your type.” If you only date one type of person, you could be missing out on other meaningful connections. 

You run the same risk if you’re too harsh on dates who take a long time to text back, or who may not be great at picking up social cues. “It breaks my heart to think about how many missed matches there are in the world where, if people had a matchmaker in the middle, they might have given each other the second or third date,” Jessica admitted. 

“You can’t kill a plant when it’s trying to bloom, right? You have to be patient and keep giving it sunlight and water.”

When working with clients, Jessica posits what she calls an “eternal question”: “What’s a dealbreaker and what’s a preference?”

She helps clients decide which of their dealbreakers are actually preferences, and which are truly immovable, with Fass Pass to Love’s Matchability Self-Test. “If I’m going to take you on as a client, you need to be open on four out of the eight (categories),” she told us. 

While most clients are willing to budge in certain categories — age range, physical appearance, and divorce status, for example — they hold fast to their values in other categories. Political views, religious observance level, and children are values Jessica encourages her clients to stand by. “If people cannot unstick on these, it’s totally acceptable,” she said. 

But at the end of the day, an open mind really does give clients their best chance at finding lasting love — that, and a supportive matchmaking team. “We’re one of those firms that really likes to tell the truth and be completely authentic and honest and realistic,” Jessica told us. 

There are shockingly few fairy godmothers outside of the movies, but Jessica and her team at Fass Pass to Love are the next best thing. “If you listen to everyone on the team, you are going to find your person,” Jessica said.