What Should I Do If I Think My Boyfriend is Cheating on Me?

Nick Slade

Written by: Nick Slade

Nick Slade

Nick spent 20 years in the dating scene before marriage. He has always been the guy friends would come to for advice on relationships, and he developed a knack for giving helpful insights. After college, Nick was a disc jockey for a few years, when the love generation was still alive, so Nick has a lot of relevant experience to draw from when it comes to every aspect of dating, falling in love and screwing things up. He holds Bachelor's degree in humanities and a slew of master’s credits in journalism. Nick is a news junkie and tries to keep up on the latest non-fiction when he has time. He has published two books on how to win at dating and relationships.

Edited by: Lillian Castro

Lillian Castro

Lillian Guevara-Castro brings more than 30 years of journalism experience to ensure DatingAdvice articles have been edited for overall clarity, accuracy, and reader engagement. She has worked at The Atlanta Journal and Constitution, The Gwinnett Daily News, and The Gainesville Sun covering lifestyle topics.

Discuss This! Discuss This!
Advertiser Disclosure

This is a difficult and delicate situation. The first thing to do is to sit down by yourself, clear your mind and emotions, and be rational. Once you get your friends or family involved, things tend to spiral out of control. In their effort to be supportive, they may say things about him that they don’t really mean, which can be awkward later.

Now think: Why do you suspect him of cheating? Is it something you saw or heard? Or is it a conclusion you jumped to because you’re insecure or because he’s out a lot? Be honest with yourself. Suspicions will make you act differently toward him, which can undermine a good relationship.

Pay attention to his habits and body language. Has his routine changed drastically? Is he out much later and more often? Does he avert his glance when he tells you where he’s going or where he’s been? Does he seem more distant and detached in romantic situations? Set up little tests. When he says he’s meeting Jake at the coffee house, tell him maybe you’ll drop in for a minute when you’re driving by. See what his reaction is.

The main thing to remember is to not obsess about it. Check his Facebook page and Tweets and those of his friends. Look for posts and photos that might explain his whereabouts — for better or worse — and be objective. This is all public information. Be careful about taking his phone and looking for texts and call logs, as this may be seen as a betrayal.

If the doubts persist, you may have to confront him. Don’t do it when he’s ready to walk out the door. Wait for a safe, warm, comfortable setting. And don’t accuse but ask.

Advertiser Disclosure

DatingAdvice.com is a free online resource that offers valuable content and comparison services to users. To keep this resource 100% free, we receive compensation from many of the offers listed on the site. Along with key review factors, this compensation may impact how and where products appear across the site (including, for example, the order in which they appear). DatingAdvice.com does not include the entire universe of available offers. Editorial opinions expressed on the site are strictly our own and are not provided, endorsed, or approved by advertisers.

Our Editorial Review Policy

Our site is committed to publishing independent, accurate content guided by strict editorial guidelines. Before articles and reviews are published on our site, they undergo a thorough review process performed by a team of independent editors and subject-matter experts to ensure the content’s accuracy, timeliness, and impartiality. Our editorial team is separate and independent of our site’s advertisers, and the opinions they express on our site are their own. To read more about our team members and their editorial backgrounds, please visit our site’s About page.