What To Do If He Won’t Text Back (7 Tips From a Matchmaker)

It’s one of the most frustrating and confusing parts of dating. You think things are going well, you’re texting back and forth with a new love interest…and then he disappears. No warning. No explanation. You’ve been ghosted!

Don’t sweat it. We’ve all been there at some point.

If you’re wondering what to do if he isn’t texting you back, you’ve got several options. I’ve come up with seven things you can try to provoke a response or receive the answer you’re looking for.

If you’re searching for the best way to seem non-eager regarding a non-returned text, send your love interest something super casual. Perhaps ask about his day or inquire about how he is feeling. 

• How’s it going?
• Are you having a good day?
• Can you believe this weather?

A lighthearted conversation removes some of the pressure of deliberately asking why he hasn’t reached out to you. It’s also a great way to appear even-tempered and non-aggressive.

If you’d like to take more of the direct approach, bluntly ask him why he hasn’t responded to any of your text messages. Asking a direct question may seem aggressive, but in the end, being straightforward can be the best route for getting closure.

Being direct leaves no room for confusion. It also gives you a better idea of his mindset. 

Too often in today’s dating world, people leave questions unanswered. This leaves daters feeling insecure about themselves and unsure about the connection altogether. So, to avoid being misled, sometimes asking direct questions is the best way to go.

If you want to get back to flirty vibes, try something lighthearted. Send a random meme that will make him laugh or prompt him to respond. Maybe something self-effacing like a “You there?” or “Was it something I said?” To show you don’t take yourself too seriously.

If he doesn’t respond to a friendly meme, that will reveal a lot as well. If he is continually ignoring your texts, he’s showing how he truly feels about you. There’s no need to continue to reach out to someone who is nonresponsive. You don’t want to seem desperate or needy. There are plenty of other fish in the sea.

Social media can be both a blessing and a curse. So much is posted online these days, and it’s easy to place puzzle pieces together. If a guy you’re dating is unresponsive, and you’re wondering what to do, check out his social media accounts. 

A lot of people chronicle their lives online on a daily basis. Perhaps his workload is busier than usual, and he hasn’t had much time to socialize with others. Or maybe he’s having some type of emergency that demands a bit more of his time. Anything is possible. 

However, also remember that it’s easy to make assumptions based on social media. So, take anything you see with a grain of salt. It’s still a wise decision to reach out to him, regardless of what you see on social media. His profile may only provide a snapshot of what’s going on in his life. Reach out to him if you want the details and — ultimately — the truth.

If all else fails, schedule a meetup with your guy. Meeting in person will be very telling. You’ll be able to observe his tone of voice, mannerisms, and body language. 

Not only will you get a response from him if you meet in person, but you’ll also see how he responds to the conversation. He won’t be able to dodge your questions or pretend he didn’t receive any messages if you’re standing right in front of him.

If your love interest has been consistently ignoring you, and you’ve decided to move on, I recommend you send him a “closure text.” Oftentimes, closure texts are ultimatums that force people to respond, especially if they don’t want to lose you. 

Keep in mind, even though he may quickly respond after you reveal your disappointment and desire to get closure, don’t be fooled by his false promises. If he’s been ignoring you for days or weeks, it’s likely for a reason. He may be a bad communicator. He may be seeing someone else. Pay attention.

As a last resort, and if all else fails, drop him. Completely forget he ever existed and move on with your life. You don’t need the drama.

Bottom line: If someone is ignoring you, it may be time to return the favor.

If he’s not texting you back on a consistent basis, it’s a sign he’s not interested, or he is spending his time elsewhere. In either scenario, you’re wasting your time and energy on that connection.

These days, it’s hard to avoid being ghosted if you’re single and actively trying to make something happen. You’re going to run into roadblocks and disappointments. You can navigate those difficult moments by keeping a cool head and weighing your options for moving forward.

Remember that someone not answering you has more to do with their character than yours.

Hopefully, the pointers I’ve provided can help regarding what to do if a guy doesn’t return texts. No matter what, stick with your gut and never look back.