He Disappeared. What Do You Think Happened?

Gina Stewart

Written by: Gina Stewart

Gina Stewart

Gina is the owner of Expert Online Dating. As an online dating consultant, she helps men and women maximize their online dating experiences to get more dates. You can visit her website, www.ExpertOnlineDating.com, for more information or to contact her.

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Edited by: Lillian Castro

Lillian Castro

Lillian Guevara-Castro brings more than 30 years of journalism experience to ensure DatingAdvice articles have been edited for overall clarity, accuracy, and reader engagement. She has worked at The Atlanta Journal and Constitution, The Gwinnett Daily News, and The Gainesville Sun covering lifestyle topics.

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Reader Question:

For the past two weeks, I have been texting, emailing and talking on the phone to an awesome guy named Brad. We have both put forth time and effort and felt like we were a good match to meet for a date.

Wednesday night he said he would call me when he got home. He didn’t do that. He hasn’t logged into his online POF account. He hasn’t logged into his Yahoo messenger account.

I called him and left a message. I emailed him and left a message. I texted him and left a message. Nothing.

What do you think happened?

-Alexis (Indiana)

Gina Stewart’s Answer:

I am sorry to say the Brad you’ve been talking to isn’t a solid baseline measure of who Brad is. Being consistent for two weeks doesn’t lend to evidence that he is a consistently consistent person.

Is it weird that he digitally dropped off the face of the earth? Yes. Could something have happened to him? Yes.

Unfortunately, it’s not your place to play detective. You’re just a girl he met online and talked to for a couple of weeks.

Assuming some tragedy hasn’t befallen him (and odds are it hasn’t), if he wants to reappear, he will.

But beware of thinking you know Brad with two weeks of talking before you even met in person — that’s a dangerous mindset.

If he does reappear without some honest catastrophic tale to tell, you can be sure you’ve found a guy who isn’t as consistent or “awesome” you thought.

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