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|Nick Slade • 9/25/14|
You’ve won her heart, and your private time together is amazing. But there is still one more hurdle you need to clear before you can really become a fixture in her life. Even more than winning over her parents or her dog, it is imperative you are accepted by her friends. Here are some of the do’s and don’ts that can help you make a good impression.
Her friends care about this girl in a way you cannot yet imagine. They know her, love her, trust her and are protective of her. Their care and concern comes from their hearts and is not based on any of the romantic feelings or “fringe benefits” your relationship with her may afford you. By all means, pay close and constant attention to her, be by her side and show her complete respect and deference. Make no mistake. You are being judged.
You do, however, have to walk a fine line. You want to be attentive and affectionate, but you don’t want to appear like a whipped slave or get overtly romantic with her. Sure, let them catch you stealing a quick smooch, but don’t touch her inappropriately or do anything to give them the idea you only have one thing on your mind.
“There’s no rocket science involved here.”
Be yourself and get involved in the conversation. You know they are going to give you the basic screening interview, so be prepared to talk about your job, your plans for the future, your hobbies, and maybe even what you like most about their friend. Have some answers ready, but don’t go on and on about yourself. Listen more than you speak until you are granted card-carrying membership in their inner circle.
It’s quite possible she will have one friend who rubs you the wrong way. Remain cool and don’t become confrontational or argumentative. It will win you points with the others, who may even come to your defense. Chances are, they don’t all get along with the bad apple either. A shared enemy can be a good thing to help you build a bond with the group.
If you have an outgoing and fun personality, by all means use it to win friends and influence people. Humor is a great icebreaker and a good way to give others a favorable opinion of you. A bit of quick wit and a thick skin can go a long way in helping you make a good impression on her friends.
You might have already fallen in love with some of her quirks and imperfections, and the two of you may already have some inside humor you are comfortable with. However, this is not the time to make a snappy comment about her nose or the way she snorts when she laughs — even if her friends are joking about it. Your lady may not take offense but her friends will. Instead of joining the good-natured ridicule, you might want to come to her defense instead, in a light or humorous way.
There’s no rocket science involved here. Just be yourself, be natural and don’t overdo the sweet or sour things until your probationary period is over.