Shes Boring In Bed

Men's Dating

“She’s Boring in Bed”

Guy Blews

Written by: Guy Blews

Guy Blews

Guy Blews can be found at where he offers practical, logical, applicable, original and sometimes brutal advice that is designed to help you thrive in the real world and succeed in the love world.

Edited by: Lillian Castro

Lillian Castro

Lillian Guevara-Castro brings more than 30 years of journalism experience to ensure DatingAdvice articles have been edited for overall clarity, accuracy, and reader engagement. She has worked at The Atlanta Journal and Constitution, The Gwinnett Daily News, and The Gainesville Sun covering lifestyle topics.

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Let’s talk about sex. If you think your girlfriend is boring in bed, there are only three reasons:

  1. She’s a bad lover.
  2. You’re a bad lover.
  3. You’re not compatible.

I know you’re hoping it’s number three. If it is, then be honest with yourself (and her), verbalize the issue and regain your sense of adventure with other people.

However, it’s probably numbers one and two.

If she’s a bad lover (in your opinion), make sure it is not just your opinion and that she really isn’t good in bed.

Think about it: Is she a little shy (in which case, you could maybe suggest to her what might work for you both), or does she just lie there and make no effort whatsoever (in which case, she’s a bad lover)?

If you’re a bad lover (which is not easy to admit), then maybe it’s time for you to start working on your game.

Think about it: Do you go straight for the mutual grand finale with little foreplay (in which you case, you need to slow down, explore her more and learn to enjoy the outskirts of sex rather than just the basics)?

Or are you only interested in yourself with little or no regard for what might turn her on (in which case, you’re a jerk)?

Either of these might cause her to be a bad lover because you give her nothing to work with.

“If your partner isn’t up to your expectations,

then it’s time to find out her preferences.”

Sex has a lot to do with chemistry, which is the combination of mental and physical attraction.

In fact, relationships have a lot to do with chemistry because without sex your relationship is just a friendship.

Biology plays a part (of course), but if there is no chemistry, then the sex will be bad and you might think she is boring in bed when in fact she is only boring in bed WITH YOU.

I find that many of my clients are failing in love, life and sex because they are not objective about the situation. They are subjective, which means they only see it from their point of view.

If you want a good lover, then be a good lover.

This does not mean you read a book or watch a video and find out all the good moves. It means you read your partner and work out which moves work for her as an individual and for you AS A COUPLE.

When it comes to sex, we all have different triggers, different erogenous zones, different limits and different desires.

If your current partner is not up to your expectations, then perhaps it is time to find out her preferences – at the very least you’re going to expand your sexual repertoire.

If that fails to turn you on, then you might as well drop the pretense and just be friends.

By the way, have you considered that she might be “boring in bed” because she doesn’t always want to do it ON the bed?!

Guys, how do you plan on improving your sex life and relationship at the same time?

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