What You Should Know Before Saying I Love You

Men's Dating

What You Should Know Before Saying I Love You

Troy Spry

Written by: Troy Spry

Troy Spry

Troy Spry is a certified life and relationship coach and the one and only "Reality Expert.” He created his blog, Xklusive Thoughts, with the intent of putting out a very realistic perspective on life, love and relationships. Visit him at @xklusive5 or on Facebook

Edited by: Lillian Castro

Lillian Castro

Lillian Guevara-Castro brings more than 30 years of journalism experience to ensure DatingAdvice articles have been edited for overall clarity, accuracy, and reader engagement. She has worked at The Atlanta Journal and Constitution, The Gwinnett Daily News, and The Gainesville Sun covering lifestyle topics.

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I see you! You are head over hills and full of nervous energy wondering, “When is the right time to say ‘I love you?'”

The truth is there is no magic formula or algorithm, but there are some things you may want to consider before you say that very powerful phrase.

1. Lust is not love.

Your knees get weak when you see her and your hormones rage when you touch, but remember that just because someone turns you on, it does not mean you are in love.

Loving someone is a big step and you must be ready to love her, even if the butterflies and lustful feelings simmer down.

2. Does this relationship have a future?

No need to waste an “I love you” on someone you don’t have a future with.

If she has made it obvious that your relationship has no next level, then professing your love won’t change that.

Save your love for someone who wants to keep you around and grow with you.

“Before you tell someone you love

them, make sure you feel it.”

3. Do you know how your mate feels about you?

Reciprocity is key, thus you should have some idea whether or not the feeling is mutual. A woman’s actions are often telling of how she feels.

Has she been willing to sacrifice her time and share herself with you? Has she put as much effort into dating you as you have to her? Has she told you before how strongly she feels about you?

4. Love at first sight is a myth.

Falling in love with someone takes time. You can’t develop deep admiration for someone without first learning about that person and sharing things with each other.

This means the likelihood of love after two dates is very slim. When you tell someone I love you, it should be genuine but also believable.

Saying I love you after a few dates will be more of a turn-off than a turn-on, so slow down.

5. Just do it!

Finally, remember there are never any guarantees in love. Part of the reason love is such a beautiful thing is that it forces us to be vulnerable and take risks with our hearts.

Before you take the risk of telling someone you love them, make sure you mean it and feel it. At some point, love will change from a noun to a verb and it will come with some expectations.

Saying I love you is easy. It’s the actual act of loving someone that you should make sure you are ready for. Choose wisely, my friends.

Join the conversation: When should you tell another person you love him or her? How soon is too soon?

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