4 Tips To Bag That Second Date

Men's Dating

4 Tips to Bag that Second Date

Nick Slade

Written by: Nick Slade

Nick Slade

Nick spent 20 years in the dating scene before marriage. He has always been the guy friends would come to for advice on relationships, and he developed a knack for giving helpful insights. After college, Nick was a disc jockey for a few years, when the love generation was still alive, so Nick has a lot of relevant experience to draw from when it comes to every aspect of dating, falling in love and screwing things up. He holds Bachelor's degree in humanities and a slew of master’s credits in journalism. Nick is a news junkie and tries to keep up on the latest non-fiction when he has time. He has published two books on how to win at dating and relationships.

Edited by: Lillian Castro

Lillian Castro

Lillian Guevara-Castro brings more than 30 years of journalism experience to ensure DatingAdvice articles have been edited for overall clarity, accuracy, and reader engagement. She has worked at The Atlanta Journal and Constitution, The Gwinnett Daily News, and The Gainesville Sun covering lifestyle topics.

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Good news! She was enchanted by your great smile and boyish charm, and you landed that first date. Now the game plan is to turn that first date into a second one. Of course, a great date is the best way to get the next date, but never lose sight of the fact women live by instinct, comfort and feelings — not by going through the motions of a date that looks good on paper.

1. Set the mood.

The magic must begin the moment you arrive for the date, which means you have to start your mental preparation as soon as you wake up in the morning. Start being the man of her dreams hours before you meet. No special instructions needed. Just be mentally prepared by living the role of her ideal man all day long.

A single rose or small bouquet of wild flowers is nice if you’re picking her up at home or heading to a nice restaurant where you can request a vase. Preempt the awkward anticipation of that first physical encounter by first giving her a brief but warm embrace, and then tell her how lovely she looks. Be sure to notice and show appreciation for a small feature of her appearance, especially if she did it just for you — a new look for her hair, a special manicure, an alluring scent, smiling eyes, or whatever.

2. Be at ease.

This will put her at ease. Hey, you’ve been getting into the role all day, so now’s the time to show off your polished demeanor. Get her involved and ask some questions, or get her approval for your plans — where to begin and so forth. She is expecting a knight on a white horse, so live up to her image for a while. When you get to your destination, be a gentleman, lean forward if you’re at a table, look her in the eyes and take charge.


“If you are the one to stop the romantic action, with a promise to

continue it in the near future, you will leave her with thoughts

of how special and chivalrous you are, while she longs for

more of your kisses and caresses.”

3. Be the prize.

A lot of guys stumble all over themselves trying to impress their date because they think of her as the main attraction of the event and themselves as her humble servant. Wrong. If you want to succeed with a lady, you have to let her see you as the prize to be won. You don’t have to be cocky, although a bit of that wouldn’t hurt, but you do have to be confident.

A real man has the self-control to tame his animal urge to get his hands on her luscious skin. We all have memories of a high school date where we held on to a girl’s hand for dear life and never let go all night. Of course, by the end of the date, we had a sweaty mess that was far from romantic. If, in the course of events, you do hold her hand or touch her knee, do it briefly, and then release it with a kind of nonchalance that belies your burning desire to swallow her whole. Let her hunger for your touch.

Nature takes care of a lot of things for us. You nearness, your attentive gaze, your wit and wisdom, and your brief touch of her cheek will be the magnet that pulls her closer to you until she cannot help but to take your arm or hand.

4. Leave her wanting more.

If things go well, it is all together possible the date may culminate in a little tongue wrestling. This is no time to be overconfident. You can still be shut out of a rematch if you lose control. A woman is not an all-you-can-eat buffet, there to fill your world with pleasure and delight. It can be a short hop from her feeling like a princess to you feeling her up like piece of meat. This woman is a wonderful, valuable creature, so don’t blow it now.

Remember this: On a first date, whoever stops kissing first wins. If you just can’t get enough control to slow things down and end the date, then she will have to. That could be the end of the romance, or her regard for you might change for the worse. If you are the one to stop the romantic action, with a promise to continue it in the near future, you will leave her with thoughts of how special and chivalrous you are, while she longs for more of your kisses and caresses. You’ve just made that second date a cinch, my friend. Well done!


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