Let's Talk First Date

Amber Brooks

By: Amber Brooks

Editor: Lillian Castro

Posted:

Do you turn into a ball of nerves at the thought of planning for a first date? If you need help cutting through those nerves and nailing that first date, check out our advice for planning and navigating first dates with poise and grace.

Here, we teach readers how to make first impressions count so they can get to that second date. Our team, loaded with dating coaches and experts, knows a thing or two about first dates.

You can browse tips and strategies that take the guesswork out of first dates, with advice tailored to both the male and female perspectives. Dive into everything first date-related. Need conversation tips? Outfit choices? You got it.

No matter the type of date, we've got you covered. Our expert advice provides the scoop on how to prepare for first dates and understand all the nuances, like body language and expectations, along the way.

200 Results

What Our Experts Say:

1.
How to Go From First Message to First Date (Exact Messaging Timeline)
Hunt Ethridge

Hunt Ethridge

Men appreciate processes. Leaning into the logical side of our brain, we look for fixes and understandable pathways. That can be great for engineering, but it doesn’t quite work so well with human emotions.   Logic doesn't always align with falling in love. For those who may not consider themselves to have a high emotional intelligence, navigating the world of dating and flirting can seem downright...

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2.
7 Questions to Ask a Lesbian on a First Date
Dr. Frankie Bashan

Dr. Frankie Bashan

First dates are rarely anyone's favorite part of dating — they can be awkward, tedious, and hard to schedule — but they're part of the package if you ever want to progress to a transcendent third date or blissful first six months of dating.  Many of my clients ask me how they can make first dates more constructive and worthwhile. They want to know what kinds of questions they can ask to be confident that...

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3.
5 Tips for Gay Men to Help Avoid Disaster on a First Date
Brian Rzepczynski

Brian Rzepczynski

While a first date can be exhilarating and exciting, it can also be fraught with anxiety. When our nervous systems detect a threat (even something as innocuous as a first date!), our body’s fight-flight-freeze response gets activated. All of our cognitive functions weaken, and we can’t think straight because the body is trying to mobilize all the energy it can to protect us from this perceived threat. This...

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4.
6 Common First Date Mistakes – According to a Matchmaker
Lauren Sanders

Lauren Sanders

First dates offer the perfect opportunity to reveal your true identity and character. You should use the time to have intentional conversations and discover whether the match is a good one for you. However, sometimes in the midst of the excitement and anxiety, individuals make mistakes that could mean the first date is also the last date. I’ve seen these mistakes many times when working with clients, and I urge...

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5.
4 Gay Dating Fails: What Not to Do On a First Date
Brian Rzepczynski

Brian Rzepczynski

Ben sat across from Dave at the fancy restaurant where they were meeting for the first time to have a romantic candlelit dinner after weeks of corresponding on a dating app.  Gripped with anxiety, Ben’s mind began swirling with negative thoughts about what Dave might be thinking of him. Ben felt his date was out of his league. He had a hard time keeping eye contact. He started glancing at other handsome men...

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6.
9 First Date Tips for Lesbian Women
Dr. Frankie Bashan

Dr. Frankie Bashan

Taking the first step is almost always the hardest part — maybe that's why first dates feel so challenging.  It can be exhausting to take the risk of putting yourself out there over and over again, and it’s demoralizing to have a dull time (or get rejected). But it doesn't have to be this way! I have some tips to make lesbian first dates a more fun, rewarding way to get to know new people. 1. Plan for...

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7.
Make a Good Impression: Advice From LGBTQ+ Matchmaker Tammy Shaklee
Sheena Holt

Sheena Holt

When you’ve been dating in the hopes of finding a long-term relationship, it can be easy to fall into patterns.  You may come to take your dates to the same bar or restaurant. You ask them the same questions. You rarely get excited before each date; they’ve turned into interviews. Tammy Shaklee specializes in matching LGBTQ singles. But when you start going on autopilot in your dating life, you can...

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8.
Give Back For National Animal Shelter Week: DatingAdvice.com’s Paw-fect Date Giveaway
Amber Brooks

Amber Brooks

We get it. Planning a date can be hard, and honestly, even redundant sometimes. But it doesn’t have to be and we're here to change that. Whether you are on the hunt for a unique first date idea or simply need a fun way to keep your partner on their toes, we have an exciting challenge for you to freshen things up with our fun giveaway.  The icing on the cake? You and your date will have the chance to spend...

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9.
5 First Kiss Tips for Modern Men
Hunt Ethridge

Hunt Ethridge

The evening has been magical. The conversation was easy and fun. The location was a perfect choice. The wine was flowing like, well, wine. Music lilts on the air as a stray breeze teases a loose strand of her hair. Your eyes meet, you lean in – and accidentally knock over her wine glass into her lap.   She leaps up with a shriek and what was once a romantic moment is now over as you frantically try to...

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10.
How Blind Dates Work: Characteristics, Tips & Challenges
Anggi Pradhini

Anggi Pradhini

“Don’t talk to strangers.” This may be good advice to keep children safe, but it’s not the best advice for your love life. To find love, sometimes you must talk to strangers. My cousin met her husband on the train when she was out of town. In a reasonable setting, talking to a stranger can make a big difference in your life. That’s the logic you must use when someone sets you up on a blind date. Be open-minded...

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11.
A Guide to First Dates: Preparation & Icebreakers
Cassey Ashley Sua

Cassey Ashley Sua

A first date is a big deal — it’s that exciting first meeting where two people explore the potential sparks of a romantic relationship. It's an opportunity to connect, share stories, and find out if you both love the same weird hobbies and Netflix shows.  Sure, the thrill of a first date can be electrifying, but let's be real, it often comes with a side of nerves and awkwardness as you figure out this whole...

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12.
Alfresco Feasts: Ranking the Top 150 Romantic Dining Destinations
Amber Brooks

Amber Brooks

The urge to indulge in one of life's most cherished rituals — alfresco dining — grows irresistible as the days grow longer. Outdoor dining experiences in bustling city streets and tranquil countryside retreats are synonymous with the changing seasons, and American cities offer a unique blend of culinary delights perfect for couples wanting to spend a romantic evening together.  At its heart, alfresco dining...

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13.
A Guide to Having a Successful Coffee Date
Anggi Pradhini

Anggi Pradhini

A coffee date is more than just a meeting over coffee; it's an opportunity to engage in meaningful conversation and create a good impression. Whether you're meeting someone new or catching up with a long-time partner, a coffee date offers a comfortable setting to have a chat. Additionally, women are three times as likely as men to choose to have coffee rather than drinks for a first date, according to a study we...

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14.
11 LGBTQ-Friendly Cities for a First Date
Chloë Hylkema

Chloë Hylkema

More and more people feel safe and accepted enough to come out, supported by communities of lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, queer, and intersex folks, along with straight allies.  According to Pew Research Center, 42% of Americans know someone who is transgender, and 26% say they know someone who identifies as nonbinary. A 2019 study also conducted by Pew showed that most Americans support gay marriage,...

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15.
The Best 15 Questions To Ask Gay Singles On a First Date
Anthony Canapi

Anthony Canapi

As a matchmaker for almost a decade, I am honored to have matched more than 2,000 singles and set up more than 700 dates in my career. But despite the number of dates I’ve planned, I would be lying if I said that all the dates had happy endings. Truth be told, I’ve worked with a number of singles who really know how to botch the first encounter.  Best Man Matchmaking caters to gay singles seeking a loving...

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16.
5 Great First Date Tips for Men
Doc Love

Doc Love

Hey, man! Yes, you, the one who is excited that you got a first date with a great lady. And now *shudder* you have to plan that first date and make sure she has fun! Don't worry, I've got you covered with five great first date tips. Here are some ideas to help men plan fun and memorable first dates that hopefully will lead to second dates! 1. Increase Your Culinary Skills Take a cooking class together....

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17.
How to Ask for a Second Date (3 Tips from a Gay Matchmaker)
Anthony Canapi

Anthony Canapi

Picture this: You’re on the first date, you went out to a nice restaurant, or met up for an outdoor activity with your date. Either way, you come to the realization that you've met a really great guy and you want to see him again. He's the type of man you see yourself with. Perhaps you have similar interests, his presence or energy makes you feel comfortable and safe, or maybe you've finally found someone who’s...

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18.
Enjoy a Healthy Date at Just BE Kitchen
Sheena Holt

Sheena Holt

The Short Version: Choosing a good restaurant for a date is always tricky, especially when you or your partner has a dietary restriction. Couples in the Denver area with dietary concerns can find a warm welcome at Just BE Kitchen. The restaurant aims to nourish guests with food that is free of major allergens and is compliant with vegan and gluten-free diets. At Just BE Kitchen, couples can enjoy their dates without...

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19.
3 First Date Topics for Baby Boomer Men to Avoid
April Braswell

April Braswell

Many single baby boomer men are getting into dating again after a dry spell. And things sure have changed since the last time you met single women and went on dates. Sure, some things remain the same. There is still the social etiquette the man pays for the dates -- certainly the first date. However, some things are very different. When you last went on a date, it might have been when the current scene...

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20.
Cara Matchmaking Encourages Singles to Take Calculated Risks and Reap Romantic Rewards
Amber Brooks

Amber Brooks

The Short Version: The loneliness of the COVID-19 pandemic made many singles want to search for a partner with whom they could build a life. But finding love isn’t always easy, and singles need to get out of their comfort zones to connect with others. Noreen Rochester and Julianna Acheson of Cara Matchmaking share their advice on planning ideal first and second dates and explain why matchmaking can be so much more...

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21.
The Old Stove Brewing Company Leaves Couples Buzzing & Wanting More
Ashayla Blakely

Ashayla Blakely

The Short Version: It’s safe to say that first dates can be nerve-wracking. Choosing the right time and place to meet makes all the difference. That’s why the right restaurant, bar, or brewery can play an important role in a budding relationship. From first dates to casual date nights, the Old Stove Brewing Co. is a perfect hangout spot for singles to come together for a nice buzz. As an award-winning brewery, Old...

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22.
6 Things You Should Never Say on a First Date (Advice for Men)
Hunt Ethridge

Hunt Ethridge

Everyone has a bad first date story. I mean, we are all learning when we start dating!  One of my worst was meeting a woman on a dating show called “Hooking Up,” circa about 2005.  She seemed cool online, but when we met, we could tell instantly that it wasn’t a good mix for either of us. The problem was, the show set us up and needed to film for HOURS, so we just had to grit it out. That’s the day I...

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23.
15 Fun & Interesting Conversation Starters for Lesbian Singles on a Date
Pamela Gort

Pamela Gort

Conversation starters are crucial for any good date. They help you break the ice and get to know your date better.  It can be hard to know what to say on the first date especially when you're not sure how open your date is. We have all been on a first date with someone we really like. You know you need to ask some questions or risk being labeled as a conversational black hole. With these 15 conversation...

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24.
5 Ways to Impress a Woman on the First Date
Hunt Ethridge

Hunt Ethridge

First dates can be some of the most magical experiences, or they can be downright panic inducing!   A good first date can make time fly by and make you feel like you’re walking on clouds.  And a bad first date can feel like the longest, most uncomfortable hour you’ve ever spent.  But, for the most part, both of these dates start at the same place: “Hi, nice to meet you!”   It’s...

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25.
Expert Tips for Having Fun on a First Date — Featuring Matchmakers in the City
Amber Brooks

Amber Brooks

Dating is supposed to be fun. It is supposed to bring romance and excitement to everyday life. But those of us who have been in the trenches of online dating or gone through a carousel of bad first dates know perfectly well that it isn’t always fun. Sometimes it’s a chore, and sometimes it’s nerve-wracking, and sometimes it is the last thing you want to do in your free time. Despite the challenges, it’s important...

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26.
The 4 Biggest Mistakes Men Make on Dates
Hunt Ethridge

Hunt Ethridge

Before the onset of the COVID-19 pandemic, dating was a lot less complicated. Getting a first date could be ridiculously easy sometimes. I remember running a speed dating event where a woman decided to swipe on Tinder during a break. She ended up matching with a guy who was at a bar down the street, and she left her mini-dates in favor of a Tinder match! The dating world had almost too many options and chances...

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27.
7 Biggest Mistakes Gay Singles Make on the First Date
Mason Glenn

Mason Glenn

Throughout my professional dating coaching and matchmaking career, I've noticed many bad patterns in terms of singles' behavior, and a lot of the time, they don't even know they're behaving this way. In case you keep missing the mark on your first dates, I’ll walk you through the biggest mistakes single gay men make when they initially meet someone they like. I’ll also share my top tips to avoid these mistakes...

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28.
Treeline Coffee Cultivates Good Vibes for a Casual Date or Caffeinated Adventure
Amber Brooks

Amber Brooks

The Short Version: Treeline Coffee Roasters has created a caffeinated haven in Bozeman, Montana. Its two locations serve specialty coffee sourced from farms around the world and roasted in-house. Couples can stop by for a casual afternoon date and share a flavorful coffee flight while chatting about their tastes and experiences. The coffee shop also has subscription boxes and roaster's choice beans available for...

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29.
What Senior Men Should Wear on a First Date
April Braswell

April Braswell

You put your single self out there, met a sexy senior lady, and asked her out on a first date. Good for you! But now you’re probably left wondering what you should wear, especially if it's been a long time since your last first date. Maybe you wore corduroy pants in the '60s, leisure suits in the '70s, gold monogram buttons on your blazer in the '80s, and biker jackets in the '90s. Well, those fashions won't...

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30.
The Dark Knot Has Ties, Pocket Squares & Accessories to Upgrade a Man’s Date Outfit
Amber Brooks

Amber Brooks

The Short Version: The Dark Knot is an esteemed online retailer of men's accessories. Its silk ties, scarves, socks, and pocket squares come in a variety of colors and patterns to complement any adult look. In addition to its luxury collection, The Dark Knot offers style tips and recommendations to ensure men know how to make a good first impression. Whether you're going on a first date or a job interview, you can...

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Amber Brooks

By: Amber Brooks

Editor-in-Chief

Amber Brooks is the Editor-in-Chief at DatingAdvice.com. When she was growing up, her family teased her for being "boy crazy," but she preferred to think of herself as a budding dating and relationship expert. As an English major at the University of Florida, Amber honed her communication skills to write clearly, knowledgeably, and passionately about a variety of subjects. Now with over 1,800 lifestyle articles to her name, Amber brings her tireless wit and relatable experiences to DatingAdvice.com. She has been quoted by the Washington Times, Cosmopolitan, The New York Post, and AskMen, among others.

See Amber's full bio »

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