How Improve Your Online Dating Life

Men's Dating

How to Improve Your Online Dating Life

Sam Stieler

Written by: Sam Stieler

Sam Stieler

Sam has been writing about dating and relationships for more than three years now. He holds a bachelor's degree from Bucknell University, has self-published a few of his own books and is currently working on mastering the double right turn in his salsa dancing classes.

Edited by: Lillian Castro

Lillian Castro

Lillian Guevara-Castro brings more than 30 years of journalism experience to ensure DatingAdvice articles have been edited for overall clarity, accuracy, and reader engagement. She has worked at The Atlanta Journal and Constitution, The Gwinnett Daily News, and The Gainesville Sun covering lifestyle topics.

Discuss This! Discuss This!
Advertiser Disclosure

Online dating presents an enormous opportunity to meet plenty of women you would never run into during day-to-day life. But online dating doesn’t represent a “magic pill” for every dating dilemma.

In fact, many men, even those who have found tremendous success with online dating, realize this form of connecting with women brings with it many of the same problems as normal dating, including the ability to fall into a rut.

If you’ve fallen into a rut with your online dating life, consider enacting these tips to rev things up once more!

1. Aim for in-person conversations.

Men tend to fall into online dating ruts when they get used to messaging the same people over and over again without ever taking things to the next level.

Developing meaningful conversations with women online is great, but doing so will eventually grow boring and you will develop the desire to actually meet these women in person and create some sort of real relationship with them.

No matter how much you like messaging with women, and no matter how frightening it may be, remember your ultimate goal with dating online is to date these women offline.

2. Message new people.

Men will also fall into online dating ruts when they online message a small handful of women and then stop sending out introductory messages to new women.

If you meet women you like chatting with or going out with in person, it’s natural to feel comfortable and to stop putting forth the effort to meet new people. This isn’t necessarily a bad thing.

If you feel excited with your online dating life as it is, then there’s no reason to branch out. But if this familiarity makes you feel bored and dull, then it’s time to message and go out with some new women.

It’s equally possible to find yourself in a rut when you only message the same type of women on dating sites, so consider diversifying your messaging pool in deeper and more meaningful ways to switch things up.


“Switching up your methods for meeting

women offers a great way to keep you on your toes.”

3. Aim high.

One of the best ways to break out of a rut is to message women you might consider “out of your league.” These ultra-attractive women present a challenge that will force you to try harder and grow as a man in order to attain their attention.

Ultimately, we grow bored and find ourselves lost in a rut when we stop challenging ourselves, when we settle for what we have and what we know we can easily get. Precisely defined challenges, such as getting responses from the three most attractive women on your site, offer the adrenaline rush you need to recharge your online dating life.

4. Pursue offline dating.

If nothing else works, the best way to improve your online dating life is to spend some time away from the site and start meeting women in the “real world” once more.

Meeting and starting up relationships with women you encounter in your daily life will present you with a new set of challenges that will reinvigorate you and make you feel excited once more at the prospect of dating.

And guess what? You shouldn’t feel surprised if spending a couple of weeks focusing on offline dating improves your online game and makes the thought of messaging some more women exciting again.

Variety plays a big role in the excitement of dating, and switching up your methods for meeting women offers a great way to keep you on your toes.

Advertiser Disclosure is a free online resource that offers valuable content and comparison services to users. To keep this resource 100% free, we receive compensation from many of the offers listed on the site. Along with key review factors, this compensation may impact how and where products appear across the site (including, for example, the order in which they appear). does not include the entire universe of available offers. Editorial opinions expressed on the site are strictly our own and are not provided, endorsed, or approved by advertisers.

Our Editorial Review Policy

Our site is committed to publishing independent, accurate content guided by strict editorial guidelines. Before articles and reviews are published on our site, they undergo a thorough review process performed by a team of independent editors and subject-matter experts to ensure the content’s accuracy, timeliness, and impartiality. Our editorial team is separate and independent of our site’s advertisers, and the opinions they express on our site are their own. To read more about our team members and their editorial backgrounds, please visit our site’s About page.