I’ve Heard Rumors About Her. Do I Run, or Do I Stay?

Dr. Wendy Walsh
Dr. Wendy Walsh Updated:
Discuss This! Discuss This!
Advertiser Disclosure

Reader Question:

I have been dating a woman for eight months. She is now pregnant with twins. She cheated on me after the first month we were together. I have been hearing “rumors” about her promiscuous relationships she had while she was with her former boyfriend. She tells me this is not true.

I don’t want to leave her because of my feelings for her and my unborn children, but I don’t want to be another guy she has done this to.

Do I believe the rumors and the fact she has cheated once already and run like hell, or do I stay?

-JD (Florida)

Dr. Wendy Walsh’s Answer:

Dear JD,

Forget rumors and get the facts. Ask for a paternity test when the children are born, and then be a responsible father to them for their whole lives.

As for your relationship with her, you’ll never be able to grow love until you can grow trust.

If you confirm the children are yours, marry her and build a family. Set down clear ground rules that she should keep her marriage vows.

Don’t depend on rumors for your feelings. Man up and take control of this situation.

If the children are yours, you owe it to your kids to create a healthy family for them.


No counseling or psychotherapy advice: The Site does not provide psychotherapy advice. The Site is intended only for use by consumers in search of general information of interest pertaining to problems people may face as individuals and in relationships and related topics. Content is not intended to replace or serve as substitute for professional consultation or service. Contained observations and opinions should not be misconstrued as specific counseling advice.

Advertiser Disclosure

DatingAdvice.com is a free online resource that offers valuable content and comparison services to users. To keep this resource 100% free, we receive compensation from many of the offers listed on the site. Along with key review factors, this compensation may impact how and where products appear across the site (including, for example, the order in which they appear). DatingAdvice.com does not include the entire universe of available offers. Editorial opinions expressed on the site are strictly our own and are not provided, endorsed, or approved by advertisers.

Our Editorial Review Policy

Our site is committed to publishing independent, accurate content guided by strict editorial guidelines. Before articles and reviews are published on our site, they undergo a thorough review process performed by a team of independent editors and subject-matter experts to ensure the content’s accuracy, timeliness, and impartiality. Our editorial team is separate and independent of our site’s advertisers, and the opinions they express on our site are their own. To read more about our team members and their editorial backgrounds, please visit our site’s About page.