Men's Dating

The Power of Eye Contact

David Wygant

Written by: David Wygant

David Wygant

David Wygant is an internationally-renowned dating and relationship coach, author and speaker. To find out more about David and all of his dating and relationship-building products, visit

Edited by: Lillian Castro

Lillian Castro

Lillian Guevara-Castro brings more than 30 years of journalism experience to ensure DatingAdvice articles have been edited for overall clarity, accuracy, and reader engagement. She has worked at The Atlanta Journal and Constitution, The Gwinnett Daily News, and The Gainesville Sun covering lifestyle topics.

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Let’s get open and real today. I’m going to ask you a question, and you’re going to give me an honest answer. What is your eye contact like?

Do you even know what your eye contact is like? Are you aware the eyes are the way to turn a woman on?

Do you also realize the more powerful your eye contact is, the more quickly you’ll turn her on?

Most guys suck at eye contact.

When most guys approach a woman for the very first time, they go there thinking about what to say instead of just being in the moment.

When you’re thinking about what to say, immediately you get confused and nervous. Your eye contact will show that.

When a guy’s eyes wander, it makes her feel nervous. She’ll start to wonder what’s wrong. She’ll start to feel things.

A powerful, strong man will not wander with his eyes. He will not be looking all over the place.

He will directly look at a woman in her eyes, say what he has to say and continue to hold her gaze as she answers, listening not only with his ears to know what to say next, but listening with his eyes to show he is a strong, powerful, bold, confident man.

See, women are feelers. They feel things when you approach them.

They want to feel secure and safe, and they want to feel they’re in the presence of a confident, bold man.


“If a woman can trust you the second she meets

you, then she’ll trust you with her number.”

Imagine this:

You go to a car dealership and talk to a car dealer, but his eyes are all over the place, wandering.

Would you trust him to sell you a good car?

You may not be consciously thinking about this, but subconsciously you’re going to feel very uncomfortable with him.

Now imagine sitting down across from somebody you’re about to cut a major business deal with.

But for some reason, every time this guy starts talking about what he’s going to offer, his eyes become shifty and he refuses to make eye contact with you.

How good would you feel after leaving the meeting? Would you feel like you’re making the right decision?

Trust is the number one thing that needs to exist for any successful relationship — friendship, friends with benefits, business, dating, whatever.

If a woman can trust you from the second she meets you, then she’ll trust you with her phone number.

She’ll trust you’ll actually call her, and she’ll trust you’ll actually follow through and take her out on a date.

And you can create that trust with powerful eye contact.

So how do you get better at it?

Very easy: look in the mirror, stare at your eyes, practice on a friend — make eye contact with everyone you meet!

I’ve found a man’s issues with eye contact come from some other insecurity.

So what other issues are you experiencing? What are your thoughts and what are your fears right now?

If everybody comments on this article today, you’ll see a lot of the fears and excuses will be the exact same.

There are not that many different fears and excuses when it comes down to meeting women, but every single fear and excuse leads to poor eye contact.

So share with me today all your fears and excuses, and let’s get this issue taken care of.

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