Why Hasnt She Called

Men's Dating

Why She Hasn’t Called?

Bethany Heinesh

Written by: Bethany Heinesh

Bethany Heinesh

Bethany has ghost-written hundreds of dating articles in the last 10 years for relationship experts all over the United States.

Edited by: Lillian Castro

Lillian Castro

Lillian Guevara-Castro brings more than 30 years of journalism experience to ensure DatingAdvice articles have been edited for overall clarity, accuracy, and reader engagement. She has worked at The Atlanta Journal and Constitution, The Gwinnett Daily News, and The Gainesville Sun covering lifestyle topics.

Discuss This! Discuss This!
Advertiser Disclosure

In the world of dating, sometimes we meet someone we click with immediately. We feel a passion so intense that we never want it to fade. Other times, we find ourselves asking one of the most perplexing questions ever posed by mankind: “Why didn’t they call?”

When Alexander Graham Bell invented the telephone, he changed the dating scene forever. The phone can be your best friend or worst enemy. When the phone rings and the name of that gorgeous gal you met at your friend’s barbecue is plastered across the screen, you get a little pep in your step. When it doesn’t, the silence is deafening, and it’s enough to make you mad.

Women are equipped to deal with whatever relationship issues come their way because they have girlfriends to talk to. We spend hours analyzing why a guy didn’t call. Men,on the other hand, you’ve got it bad. You have no real outlet because guys don’t sit around and gab about relationship insecurities. When she doesn’t call, you’re left in the dark. Because I know we can be quite perplexing, I’m going to share some secrets with you and explain why women don’t call.

1. We picked up a psycho vibe.

In today’s increasingly hostile world, women can never be too careful. Early on, our senses are on high alert, looking for any little reason for why you might be a weirdo. This is not to say you’re a weirdo, but perhaps you told a bad joke or shared some quirk about yourself that made her uncomfortable. If she senses a red flag, you can forget it. She’s gone forever.


“When a woman digs you, she’s waiting by the phone for

you to call. If she doesn’t call you back, there’s a reason.”

2. You said something she found offensive.

If you say something that conflicts with her value system, she’ll walk away and never look back. This is actually good news. If you and your date don’t connect on a fundamental level, you have no chance at success anyway.

3. She got back together with her ex.

The reality is that a lot of women start talking to a guy to get over an ex. When he comes crawling back, she forgives him and goes back for another spin on the relationship merry-go-round. This has nothing to do with you, and there’s nothing you can do to prevent such a circumstance.

4. You’re overly anxious to be in her company.

Nothing will turn a woman off faster than a clingy, needy, psycho caller. Men make this mistake often — you call too much. I’ve met plenty of men I was interested in only to be completely put off because they kept calling me. Go easy at first. Make her sweat a little.

5. She has her own issues.

Just because you go out with a woman whose company you enjoy doesn’t mean she is free from serious emotional baggage. Many women recognize their own inability to commit to a real relationship and avoid them altogether.

6. She didn’t feel a connection with you.

A guy can be a perfect gentleman, say and do all the right things and be a great catch. But if a woman doesn’t feel “butterflies,” chances are she’ll cut her losses and move on with no explanation. This is not to say the problem lies with you. It just means the two of you wouldn’t make a good fit.

7. It just wasn’t meant to be.

This one’s my favorite. Whether the timing is off, she’s just not that into you or she simply can’t deal. It’s just not gonna happen. Take this as a blessing in disguise, and thank the universe for freeing you up to find the woman who’s right for you.

Now that we’ve identified the most common reasons why women don’t call, let’s lay down the law when it comes to phone etiquette. If you like a woman and had a great time with her, call her. If you get her voicemail, tell her, “Hi! This is me. Just wanted you to know I’m thinking about you. Give me a call!”

If she doesn’t call you back, wait three days before calling again. Never call twice in one day if you don’t hear from her. When you call the second time, say, “OK, this is my second call. I’m leaving you a message to say howdy. The ball is in your court.” If she doesn’t call back, delete her number and move on. Trust me, when a woman digs you, she’s waiting by the phone for you to call. If she doesn’t call you back, there’s a reason.  

Advertiser Disclosure

DatingAdvice.com is a free online resource that offers valuable content and comparison services to users. To keep this resource 100% free, we receive compensation from many of the offers listed on the site. Along with key review factors, this compensation may impact how and where products appear across the site (including, for example, the order in which they appear). DatingAdvice.com does not include the entire universe of available offers. Editorial opinions expressed on the site are strictly our own and are not provided, endorsed, or approved by advertisers.

Our Editorial Review Policy

Our site is committed to publishing independent, accurate content guided by strict editorial guidelines. Before articles and reviews are published on our site, they undergo a thorough review process performed by a team of independent editors and subject-matter experts to ensure the content’s accuracy, timeliness, and impartiality. Our editorial team is separate and independent of our site’s advertisers, and the opinions they express on our site are their own. To read more about our team members and their editorial backgrounds, please visit our site’s About page.