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The Short Version: Dr. Chloe Carmichael helps successful singles find healthy, significant relationships. Combining her clinical education, experience, and holistic background, she creates a space for clients to define what they want in a partner, recognize their sabotaging dating patterns, and find the person of their dreams. Through therapy and coaching, Dr. Chloe and her associates teach singles how to communicate their needs with confidence. Her book, “The 10 Commandments of Dating,” also provides actionable advice on achieving a lasting, rewarding relationship. Dr. Chloe doesn’t just ask her clients how they feel about their issues, she rolls up her sleeves and gives them the tools, strategies, and direction they need to accomplish their goals in love and beyond.
Helping others achieve their personal goals has always been a part of Dr. Chloe Carmichael’s purpose, and her path to becoming a clinical psychologist was rooted in that desire to help people.
“I was a yoga teacher before I was a psychologist, and I was working with people on specific goals they wanted to accomplish,” she said. “We were exploring their sources of stresses, what they did to manage them, and, of course, talked about how they could use yoga and meditation to help deal with them.”
Working with her yoga clients unearthed a more profound passion for Dr. Chloe. She said she started developing a passionate interest in her clients’ personal goals, progress, and the factors in their lives that determined each. That sparked a desire to learn more.
“I wanted to engage with the clients on a deeper, more holistic level than just yoga,” she said.
So, she pursued her doctorate in Clinical Psychology. Since earning her degree, she has opened a thriving practice, authored several papers, and gained a wealth of training and experiential knowledge — not only in psychology but also in meditation and goal-attainment.
She’s proud of the unique hybrid nature of her academic training and holistic learning.
“I keep my knowledge of meditation and yoga, but I wanted to add my knowledge about psychology to work with people purely in therapy and coaching sessions,” she said.
Dr. Chloe, who meets with clients worldwide and in her practice in New York City, said she applies all of her training and expertise to help her clients see dramatic results.
Dr. Chloe works with a team of eight therapists, and often sees single men and women who are looking for a life partner. She tackles common issues her clients struggling with, including dealing with a breakup, learning to set boundaries, and how to date more intelligently.
She said most women struggle in relationships because they date without being straightforward about what they want.
“I work with a lot of women who are very successful, but they’re struggling in the relationship department. Either they have trouble getting out on a lot of first dates, or they’re going on dates, and then they’re getting into relationships a little too soon. They tend to get emotionally committed before they understand the other person’s interest and capacity for a long-term relationship,” she said.
Dr. Chloe also points out that many women think they’re protecting themselves emotionally because they wait until they’re in a monogamous relationship to have sex. What they often don’t understand, however, are the reasons the other person wants monogamy.
“A lot of times, a man wants monogamy because he wants a monogamous sexual relationship. It’s the equivalent of ‘going steady,’ where the woman feels it’s practically taboo to talk about engagement,” she said. “That’s where women can get stuck. They don’t want to be pursuing the man, but they are in a situation where they’ve decided to be monogamous to him, and he’s not planning on moving the relationship forward.”
That is one area in which Dr. Chloe specializes.
Dr. Chloe gives her patients strategies and tools to date wisely. These simple and practical changes are often uncovered through therapy that yields a more enjoyable, successful dating experience. Her clients learn how to manage their emotions and urges, so things don’t escalate too quickly.
She also teaches them to voice their needs in a way that doesn’t sound needy, but, most of all, she supports her clients through the process, giving them the specific therapeutic interventions to help them radically alter their dating patterns and get the results they deserve.
One of the guiding resources Dr. Chloe uses to help clients and non-clients find quality relationships is her book, “The 10 Commandments of Dating.” The book sprung to life as she was preparing for a televised interview.
“I was on television to talk about dating in New York, and I wanted to keep myself organized for the segment. So I wrote down my top 10 tips about dating, and the host, Ernie Anastos, told me I should distill them to a short, easy-to-read book. I thought he was right, so I did it,” she said.
She packs the book with her knowledge about how to date smart and get rid of challenging patterns. She used some of these tips — and her expertise as a clinical psychologist — to find the man of her dreams. Much of her advice is based on self-knowledge and self-confidence with a clear way to enact them.
Readers have overwhelmingly praised the book. In an online review, one reader, Ian, said, “I wish this book were available to me 10-20 years ago. What an easy to read yet informative guide to taking control of your dating life. This book is for the person who has always been frustrated, and they are now serious about taking control of their dating life.”
The book is available in paperback, on Kindle, audiobook, and even on video. She said many of her clients especially enjoy the audiobook.
“A lot of people like listening to the principles often so they can keep them in the back of their minds,” she said.
Sometimes, you have to leave a relationship that isn’t right to find the relationship you’re meant to be in. Other times, your partner decides you’re not the one. No matter the reason, breakups can be difficult and often lead us back into old behaviors that aren’t healthy.
Dr. Chloe has extensive experience helping clients get over breakups. She understands that working through a split includes not only getting past the immediate sadness and disappointment but also understanding the patterns that may have contributed to the breakup.
She also helps clients learn how to manage their feelings of loneliness, which can be one of the most challenging aspects of a breakup. Some of her sessions even focus on how to handle the urge to contact an ex and how to respond if your ex contacts you.
Other sessions include exercises to help you regain your self-esteem and identity to prepare yourself for dating again and finding a healthy, loving relationship. For those recently experiencing a breakup, she provides 14 days of Breakup Support via email to help them transition from a relationship and into a new chapter of their lives.
Dr. Chloe provides plenty of online resources to help people make productive changes in their dating lives. In addition to her book, she has an informative blog curated to help her clients — and other high-achieving professionals — deal with the issues life throws at them.
Dr. Chloe said she loves her work and feels rewarded by the success she sees her clients experience every day.
“What a lot of my clients say they like about me is I don’t just say, ‘How do you feel about that?’ I offer practical, cognitive behavioral tips.” — Dr. Chloe Carmichael
A typical success story is usually a female client who’s feeling like she’s banging her head against the wall with dating, Dr. Chloe said. “She’s either not going on enough dates, dating the wrong people, or getting committed before the person makes a good case as to why she should become monogamous with them,” she said. “Through the work we do together, women often find a healthy, monogamous relationship that leads to engagement and marriage.”
Dr. Chloe said she finds her career empowering and fulfilling because she gives clients the tools they need to find happiness, and her clients find her empowering because she teaches them how to heal themselves from the inside.
“What a lot of my clients say they like about me is I don’t just say, ‘How do you feel about that?’” she said. “I offer practical, cognitive behavioral tips to help people manifest changes in their lives.”