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You know how to get a guy’s attention in person: a sexy smile, your perfect legs, an “accidental” quick flash of a little cleavage. But those same ploys that are genuine and appealing in person can come off as a little trampy or desperate online.
In real life, you can mix brief subliminal come-on messages in with your straight-laced powers of attraction. You can widen your eyes ever so briefly, or you can make him wonder, “Was that a wink? Did she just pucker her lips? Is she checking me out?” But the virtual world doesn’t have the chemistry or mystery of real life.
Here are a few tips that might help you get a guy’s attention online.
Whether it’s a dating site, Facebook or an instant messenger, select a photo that will grab him. Avoid the studio or posed picture with the smile plastered on, and also avoid the picture that is too distant or shows you in a group of two or more. You want a candid photo that shows your charm and personality. Laughing, having fun, showing your dimples — something that is primarily a head shot, or head and upper body, so he can really see your face.
When you’re chatting with a guy online, devote your time to the chat. Some people try to chat with two or three people at a time, or they go about other business after each response. If you want his attention, then give him your full attention. Long pauses between responses are not conducive to getting acquainted. And if he has a two- or three-minute lag between every response, just tell him maybe you can chat some time when it’s more convenient for him. Demand his attention and you might just get it.
In the course of your chat, something will come up that gives you an opportunity to propose a meeting. This is also a good way to flush out the guys who are not seriously looking, aren’t really available, or just like to sit around in their underwear talking to girls. “Really? You get your dog groomed at Roscoe’s? I work a mile from there. OMG, we should totally meet for coffee next time.” See what happens.
The key is accessibility and availability. A guy’s biggest fear, even online, is rejection. If you look like a down-to-earth, friendly girl in your photo, are always there with a response when he takes the time to chat with you, and might actually be able to walk out of his dreams and into his car in the near future, you are bound to grab the attention of a lot of great guys.