I’m a 19-Year-Old Virgin. Should I Wait for Someone I Care About?

Dr. Wendy Walsh

Written by: Dr. Wendy Walsh

Dr. Wendy Walsh

Dr. Wendy Walsh is the author of "The 30-Day Love Detox"" (April 2013).

Edited by: Lillian Castro

Lillian Castro

Lillian Guevara-Castro brings more than 30 years of journalism experience to ensure DatingAdvice articles and reports have been edited for overall clarity, accuracy, and reader engagement.

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Reader Question:

I’m a 19-year-old female and still a virgin. I’m really worried about this. I feel like just losing it to anybody, but at the same time, I want to do it with someone I care about. I have guys who are interested in me, but I don’t feel the same way. I have done everything but intercourse and feel weird for still being a virgin.

-Beth (London)

Dr. Wendy Walsh’s Answer:

Kudos to you! It’s quite a feat to remain a “technical virgin” in a high-supply sexual economy. You should know you are not alone. In a recent study of American college students, a full 25 percent were virgins.

And surprisingly, religion was the third most quoted reason to remain a virgin. Most people said they wanted to avoid pregnancy or a sexual relationship that might derail their education and career plans.

The truth is, there are two distinct dating markets, one where people practice slow-love as a way to build a healthy relationship and the so-called hookup culture. Another study showed that the more sexual partners a woman has had, the more likely she is to be on an antidepressant.

My advice: Stick to your guns and wait for someone you really care about.

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