How To Get The Summer Fling Youve Always Wanted

Gay Dating

How to Get the Summer Fling You’ve Always Wanted

Jonathan Welford

Written by: Jonathan Welford

Jonathan Welford

Jonathan Welford is a dating and relationship coach, author of three relationship coaching books and regular columnist. He heads up a coaching and therapy practice specializing in dating and relationships. He lives in the UK with his husband and their English bulldog named Lola.

Edited by: Lillian Castro

Lillian Castro

Lillian Guevara-Castro brings more than 30 years of journalism experience to ensure DatingAdvice articles have been edited for overall clarity, accuracy, and reader engagement. She has worked at The Atlanta Journal and Constitution, The Gwinnett Daily News, and The Gainesville Sun covering lifestyle topics.

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We are getting closer to the summer holidays. The sandy beaches of faraway places look so appealing and full of opportunity to relax, tan and perhaps have a little romance.

As a single gay traveler, when exploring foreign lands, it would be rude not to go native.

If the opportunity to have a holiday romance comes into your sight, then why not go for it?

Treat it as a fling.

Yes, a holiday romance can develop to be a long-term thing. However, when entering the territory of a holiday fling, treat it as a that and savor it.

Like your travels to a foreign land, it’s something for a fixed time only.

Bringing a date back to your hotel room can be like bringing a bottle of local liquor back, that one that slipped down your throat and made your taste buds and body fizz with excitement and joy.

However, once it travels into your time zone, it tastes like dirty underwear that has festered at the bottom of your travel bag.

I know of some guys that go online to line up a date or two, which seems just as important to them as the actual travel adventure.

The term “around the world in 80 shags” should actually be made into a travel documentary. However, I think there is possibly an X-rated film with a similar title.

“There may be language challenges that

seem cute when you’re in their country.”

It’s normal to get a little lonely sometimes during travels and want to find a single guy to be a reliable date for upcoming outings, or maybe just a short-term hookup for those hot summer nights. Whatever you fancy, it’s waiting for you somewhere out there.

So what are the key benefits of a summer holiday romance?

1. Company.

You have someone to share your experiences with. When you see something exciting, amusing or amazing, you can turn to them and talk about the event.

2. Sex.

You can wake up with a smile on your face and a comfortable body to explore before the day’s travel plans commence.

3. Local flavor.

If you are dating a local guy, you will experience parts of the country that aren’t in the guidebook. Your travel experience will have a true originality with a focus on the local flavor.

4. Saving money.

If you’ve lined the date up online prior to your travels, then the travel costs can be dramatically reduced, as you could get free accommodation thrown in.

If this is the case, then have alternative accommodation lined up if your online date turns out to be a psycho.

It could be the start of something amazing, long term and full of possibilities. There is always optimism. However, you need to be realistic.

And don’t forget to think about these things during your trip:

1. Protection.

Holiday romances are great. A sexual adventure can be the cherry on the cake of your travels.

However, if your date is like the international airport with many people going through him from all corners of the world, be careful and use protection.

You want fond memories from your travels, not a chronic illness or a heap of medical issues.

2. An end date.

Unless you want to enter into a long-distance relationship, your romance should have an end date. It’s all too common to pledge to stay together no matter what the distance.

Be realistic. Unless you have a bottomless pit of funds to cover airfare and a very flexible job where you have lots of annual leave, the relationship has a use-by date.

3. Different cultures.

When going to some far east countries, be wary of being landed with a bill for services rendered.

There is an industry out there capitalizing on sex tourists. Make sure you know what the deal is before arranging your romance.

Also be aware of the legal implications of having a same-sex encounter in a foreign land. Some cultures and customs are very relaxed and Westernized, but others are not.

There have been many cases reported and unreported about blackmail gangs that are out to fleece a traveler out of substantial sums of money.

4. Be completely aware of your location.

Let people know where you’re going. The traditional dating rule is to have a check-in time with friends.

The worst thing you can do is arrive jet-lagged at an airport and be whisked off somewhere you don’t know. Travelers go missing all the time. You’ve seen the reports. Don’t be a statistic.

When arriving in a new country, be awake, alert and refreshed before you meet. Know the geography of the area. Have a get-out-quickly scheme ready.

5. Different cultures.

When you live in two separate countries, you may have different cultural backgrounds. You have different traditions, different homes, and different points of view. It’s not impossible to make a cross-cultural relationship work. But the odds are stacked against you.

There may be language challenges that seem so cute and adorable when you’re with them in their country, but in the cold reality of everyday life, it may not be workable. Eventually one person is going to have to move for a long-term relationship to work out.

That adds a whole new dimension to the situation. Unless you like form-filling challenges with visa departments and a big pot of money to pay for the costs, then remove these thoughts from your mind.

This may seem like a complete downer on holiday romances. It’s not. They can be amazing, so long as you take them for what they are.

Enjoy the moment. Be sensible. Be safe and secure. If you create a big rose-colored balloon around a holiday romance, sooner or later the balloon will burst or deflate to a saggy mess.

What are your experiences of holiday romances?

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