How Do I Know if My Girlfriend is Lying to Me About Her Ex?

Nick Slade

Written by: Nick Slade

Nick Slade

Nick spent 20 years in the dating scene before marriage. He has always been the guy friends would come to for advice on relationships, and he developed a knack for giving helpful insights. After college, Nick was a disc jockey for a few years, when the love generation was still alive, so Nick has a lot of relevant experience to draw from when it comes to every aspect of dating, falling in love and screwing things up. He holds Bachelor's degree in humanities and a slew of master’s credits in journalism. Nick is a news junkie and tries to keep up on the latest non-fiction when he has time. He has published two books on how to win at dating and relationships.

Edited by: Lillian Castro

Lillian Castro

Lillian Guevara-Castro brings more than 30 years of journalism experience to ensure DatingAdvice articles have been edited for overall clarity, accuracy, and reader engagement. She has worked at The Atlanta Journal and Constitution, The Gwinnett Daily News, and The Gainesville Sun covering lifestyle topics.

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What she wants to be true and what really is true can sometimes be different. Persistent exes can be hard to shake sometimes, too. And feelings that she thought were gone might resurface later on.

If her breakup with her ex is relatively recent, she is going to spend time thinking about the relationship. She still has issues to resolve. Why did they breakup? What did she do wrong? That sort of thing. If she walked out because he was unfaithful, he might be trying to fight or grovel his way back. It’s best not to get involved on the rebound.

There’s a reason you think she might be lying. It could be that you are just an untrusting and unreasonably jealous guy. Or it could be because of the symptoms she is exhibiting.

The best indication that her heart does not belong to only you is to notice if her body seems to be all yours.

If she is distant, avoids eye contact, kisses her hand and then plants the fake kiss on you with her hand, ends make-out sessions more quickly than before, has to jump up off the couch when you start getting romantic, or is not totally “present” during sex, you might have a problem.

The best way to find out the real truth about your girlfriend and her ex is to ask her.

Her words might be telling you that she is finished with him, but her mood or tears or temper are telling you something else. Sit down and have a talk. You will have to be supportive and not make accusations. Ask her if she needs a little rope or what you can do to make things better.

Communication is the key to so many aspects of a relationship. But communication only works when it is positive, supportive and non-confrontational.

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