Why Do I Never Get the Second Date?

Bethany Heinesh

Written by: Bethany Heinesh

Bethany Heinesh

Bethany has ghost-written hundreds of dating articles in the last 10 years for relationship experts all over the United States.

Edited by: Lillian Castro

Lillian Castro

Lillian Guevara-Castro brings more than 30 years of journalism experience to ensure DatingAdvice articles have been edited for overall clarity, accuracy, and reader engagement. She has worked at The Atlanta Journal and Constitution, The Gwinnett Daily News, and The Gainesville Sun covering lifestyle topics.

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If you’ve recently been on more than one date that didn’t lead to a second date, something’s wrong. While there are a number of legitimate reasons a woman doesn’t follow up for a second date – reasons that have nothing to do with you  – it is usually an indication that you need a fresh approach.

Usually a woman doesn’t give you a second date because she identified a red flag on the first one. Remember, when women go on a first date, they are hypersensitive to your flaws, looking for any reason you might be a weirdo.

Here are a few reasons why a woman never goes out with you again:

1. Your appearance.

Are you clean-cut and wearing matching attire? Do you smell good?

2. Your conversation.

Are you telling off-color jokes? Do you bring up politics or religion?

3. Your personal life.

Are you unemployed? Do you have four baby mamas?

4. Your car and cash.

Is your car filled with garbage? Do you take her to Denny’s and bring a “buy one get one free” coupon?

Some quick advice: Get one of your platonic girlfriends to go on a date with you. Approach it as a kind of “date dry run.” Act how you normally would. Ask your friend to give you honest feedback and make changes accordingly.

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