What Turns Men On

Women's Dating

What Turns Men On?

Sam Stieler

Written by: Sam Stieler

Sam Stieler

Sam has been writing about dating and relationships for more than three years now. He holds a bachelor's degree from Bucknell University, has self-published a few of his own books and is currently working on mastering the double right turn in his salsa dancing classes.

Edited by: Lillian Castro

Lillian Castro

Lillian Guevara-Castro brings more than 30 years of journalism experience to ensure DatingAdvice articles have been edited for overall clarity, accuracy, and reader engagement. She has worked at The Atlanta Journal and Constitution, The Gwinnett Daily News, and The Gainesville Sun covering lifestyle topics.

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It’s a question you’ve likely wondered about, asked about and read about countless times — What turns men on? What drives men crazy? What makes men want to think about you all the time while highly anticipating the next time you meet? What will make a man notice you and want to ask you out instead of all the other girls?

Sure, I could answer this question with a variety of filthy answers, each more specific and vulgar than the last, but ultimately sex is only one route to a man’s heart.

Unless you’re planning on becoming extremely promiscuous, a library of sexual techniques won’t really address your desire to be able to turn on every man you meet with little more than a touch of shared conversation and a few lingering glances.

To achieve that, you need to cultivate a few of the qualities and traits all of the world’s most attractive women share.


Yes, believe it or not, men are deeply, deeply attracted to confident women. No matter how many media hits the vacuous, defenseless Kewpie doll archetype may receive, men will always find themselves ensnared by women with a strong sense of themselves.

This confidence doesn’t need to manifest itself in being loud, brassy or aggressive. There are plenty of confident women who are reserved, who keep to themselves, who come off a little more introverted than extroverted.

Any woman, no matter her temperament, who knows who she is and feels secure in that knowledge will attract all the men she can handle.


“Men find women’s

quirkiness attractive.”

Overt sensuality.

Please note I used the word “sensuality” and not “sexuality.” Men absolutely want to date women who are highly sexual in nature, but most men aren’t particularly attracted to women who flaunt their sexuality around at every possible moment, just as most women aren’t particularly attracted to men who are too overt and obvious with their own carnal nature.

However, even though men aren’t looking for a woman who is uncomfortably overt with her sexuality, men are looking for a woman who is highly sensual. By that, I mean men are attracted to women who clearly enjoy and appreciate indulging in their physical nature.

Women who love food, who love to dance and who generally move with a level of easy grace and effortless comfort with their bodies demonstrate their deep sensuality. And men can’t get enough of these women.

Trust me on this one. Any man who notices how sensual you are will assume your deep sexual nature as well. Display the former and save the latter for your privately shared moments.


When I say men are attracted to weirdness, I don’t mean the sort of weirdness that involves collecting dolls and replacing their heads with photos of your ex-boyfriends. I mean the sort of weirdness that represents an authentic reflection of your own deepest, dorkiest nature.

Because let’s be honest — there’s probably some aspect of your personality that is nerdy, that is quirky or that’s a little too passionate about Justin Bieber.

Instead of trying to hide this side of yourself, highlight it. Make it clear you aren’t the queen of cool. Let it be known you aren’t scared of seeming silly or a little bit odd.

Men find women’s quirkiness attractive because it not only brings you down to earth and makes you a real person, it also allows us to drop our own walls and be more honest about those quirky aspects of our own personalities we might rather tuck away from the limelight.

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