Dateworks Matchmakers Prioritize Self-Love in the Dating Experience

The Short Version: Finding love can be tricky, which is why Malaysia’s singles turn to Dateworks Matchmaking for a helping hand. Joanne Ng founded Dateworks in 2017 to help singles learn the ins and outs of relationships. Now, the team works to connect singles for love based on compatibility and shared values. Dateworks matchmakers help their clients learn what’s holding them back in dating and overcome the hurdles in their love lives.

The relationships we hold can define our lives. That’s why sometimes it may make sense to bring in a professional to find the right romantic partner. Some busy singles don’t have time for online dating and rely on the help of matchmakers to simplify the process. 

Matchmakers connect people who have compatible personalities and similar goals in life. The pros make sure that they introduce people who will genuinely complement each other just as they are. Sometimes, a family member may unofficially step up to play matchmaker — other times, professionals like the team at Malaysia’s Dateworks Matchmaking are hired. 

“I was always interested in terms of human relationships, as well as human interactions,” said Gwen Lau, who is currently a matchmaker at Dateworks in Malaysia. 

When she learned about the unique job opening, Lau realized it was right up her alley. “After learning what they do, I found it quite interesting,” Lau told us. “It is a very meaningful journey because we see how people feel about the relationships, how they are as people.”

Lau can see who’d match well, and who’d have too many incompatibilities to work long term. 

Dateworks was started by Joanne Ng, one of the top matchmakers in Malaysia. The company got its start in 2017, and the team worked with individuals one on one. Dateworks offers many services, from the popular choice of personalized matchmaking to cross-border matchmaking, which is perfect for singles looking to meet other singles in a different country. 

Dateworks also offers virtual matchmaking, similar to what you may find online today. Think of it like Match, but with a professional by your side to do the hard work for you.

“Our founder, Joanne, started off with the intention of educating people about relationships,” said Lau. “I would say in Asian cultures, overall, no one really taught us about relationships. You have to stumble across and explore yourself. So that was her main intention.” From there, they branched out to matchmaking.

The Dateworks matchmaking process is straightforward for clients. “It starts with a very tailored approach,” Lau said. During the first session, the matchmaker asks clients detailed questions about who they are as a person.

“This session allows us to understand their personality, their family backgrounds, their hobbies, interests, and of course, most importantly, what they strive to learn in a relationship,” she explained. 

Ng and Lau are providing much-needed services. Lau explained that a lot of young single people are more career-focused, and talking about love and sex can still be seen as taboo. “It is improving,” Lau said, but added there’s still “lots to learn.” 

Lau also makes sure she talks about boundaries with her clients. “We want to understand what our candidates think about acceptable actions during a relationship before we look through and filter matches for them,” said Lau. 

All of this will help ensure that the relationship is comfortable for both parties. Finding compatibility between people with different backgrounds and perspectives is important for a long-lasting romantic match.

Lau has learned a lot in her career about what holds many single people back. As the Dateworks site states, “Most coaches ascertain that during a session where clients talk about their backgrounds, they exhibit these common mistakes: they work too much, they are too shy, too introverted, too fussy, too picky, too routine, too restricted and ultimately, the worst mistake of all, they give up on love.” 

Part of Lau’s job is to talk to each individual and try to figure out what their setbacks may be. From there, they can work on themselves, and then work on finding a compatible match.

Some singles find it hard to date because they have never learned how to love themselves. “For us, it is also very important to guide them through the process, so to learn how to value yourself and know what you want,” said Lau. “And then you talk about loving others.”

To find their best match, people need to realize how much they bring to the table. Even outside of a matchmaking agency, this theory is an important one to put into practice. Instead of talking down to yourself, think about what makes you unique. If it’s hard for you to see what makes you special, it may be even more difficult for others to realize how wonderful you are. 

That said, confidence doesn’t always come easy, which is why it’s nice to have help. The Dateworks team uses coaching methodologies to make sure their clients feel good about themselves. Aside from conversations with their singles, Dateworks offers unique services, such as wardrobe styling and grooming tips, for their singles to feel their best. 

Matchmakers help young singles fully realize their worth and what they should expect in a healthy relationship. Lau and other talented matchmakers at Dateworks make sure each connection they make has the best chance for lifelong success. 

Hiring a third party to help you realize where you might be stalling on your pursuit for love can often teach you about yourself. 

The work matchmakers do helps facilitate dates; it also helps clients realize why they deserve a happy and meaningful connection. Without that realization, any relationship, especially a romantic one, would be difficult to maintain. 

While Lau does the hard work behind the scenes, the singles who work with her don’t go into a new situation blindly. They get a say in their dates. “We match them based on compatibility, and then we will share a profile with them,” said Lau. After both parties agree to give each other a chance, the matchmakers will arrange for an in-person or a virtual date.

Physical dates can be harder to set up since the agency has grown. Lau said that while many of their clientele are Malaysian, some of them are expats from Canada, Europe, Singapore, or Taiwan. 

Many people prefer first having online connections  before traveling a long distance for a face-to-face meetup. Dateworks knows that many people have different preferences when it comes to dating and tries to accommodate various situations.

Along with personal preferences come different attitudes toward dating. While many clientele are open to new things, some people may feel a bit reserved or too afraid to leave their comfort zones.

Lau has plenty of advice based on her experience. “Definitely be more open minded,” she said. While it can be a nerve-wracking process, she wants people to know that nerves are quite normal at the start of the process. 

“I realized people tend to be very worried, okay, like, am I going to say the wrong thing like is the person’s going to be a good match. So it’s normal. But we definitely hope that people can be more accepting,” she said. 

“Accept your vulnerability,” Lau continued. She said she believes in learning from each interaction, even those that won’t end in true love. The more you communicate, the better you’ll get at it. And the more you accept your vulnerability, the more comfortable you will feel.

Putting the work into yourself, especially if you feel like you’re unworthy, can be hard. If you’ve been single for a long time, remind yourself why you’re a catch. Don’t be afraid to work on yourself every day, and find hobbies and activities that make you happy. 

There are compatible people out there for everyone, but sometimes having a professional step in can take some of the pressure off the process. 

Dateworks can help when dating seems overwhelming. The professionals offer positive support and valuable introductions to change single people’s lives.

“Meeting people means there’s a chance. There’s an opportunity to have a connection,” Lau said.