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|Gina Stewart • 9/25/14|
I know it’s intimidating to write your dating profile. A lot of sites try to help you out by instead of giving you just a blank box and saying, “Go put yourself in a box,” they give you some little funky questions to answer.
You may think, “What is this all about?” or “Why does this matter?”
Lesson one of this column begins with this: Think about why dating sites have these questions. They aren’t trying to stump you. It’s not a job interview.
It’s a process to try to get you to reveal interesting things about yourself to potential dates.
This helps create conversation topics that help people communicate and get to know each other, which helps you decide if you want to go on a date. It’s honestly not that complicated.
So when being presented with a topic and blank box, here are the rules:
“I don’t know,” “I don’t feel comfortable talking about this” or “How am I supposed to know this?” all say nothing about you to a reader. Why bother typing it?
“Coloring outside the lines can
only get you more attention.”
What is it trying to reveal about me to people who read my profile? Answer that question.
If eHarmony asks you who the most influential person is outside your parents, it’s not intended to diminish the role your parents play in your life.
It’s to get you talking about less conventional people and how they have affected the person you are.
If you don’t like what a question asks, write what you WANT to talk about.
OkCupid asks users to mention “the more private thing you’re willing to admit on a dating site.”
It’s asking what you’re willing to admit. It is not requiring you to dive into the scary place in the dark part of your brain to scare off potential dates.
If the most private thing you are willing to admit is you get a solid eight hours of sleep a night, you are entitled to write that!
If you think a question is stupid, write about whatever you want. There are no judges with score cards or teachers with red pens marking you down for not answering the question.
If it asks you about favorite books and you are a podcast junkie, write about what you like! If you don’t have a favorite hot spot, write about how you can spot poison oak.
Coloring outside the lines in online dating can only get you more attention.
The point is that you say SOMETHING. Good luck, daters.
Photo source: bookmorebrides.com.