The 1 Thing Women Loathe About Men

Men's Dating

The #1 Thing Women Loathe About Men

Annie Ashdown

Written by: Annie Ashdown

Annie Ashdown

Annie Ashdown is dubbed by the U.K. press as "The Confidence Expert." She is a master hypnotherapist and author of "Doormat Nor Diva Be." Annie’s next book, "The Confidence Factor," is launching in the U.S. in October 2013. Annie co-hosts an ITV series with Jeremy Kyle and was judge on "Britain’s Next Top Coach" in 2009.

Edited by: Amber Brooks

Amber Brooks

Amber Brooks is the Editor-in-Chief at When she was growing up, her family teased her for being "boy crazy," but she preferred to think of herself as a budding dating and relationship expert. As an English major at the University of Florida, Amber honed her communication skills to write clearly, knowledgeably, and passionately about a variety of subjects. Now with over 1,800 lifestyle articles to her name, Amber brings her tireless wit and relatable experiences to

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Something like 98% percent of women tell me there is one particular thing they LOATHE about men that is also a deal-breaker.

This particular thing will RUIN your chances of success with women.

Women LOATHE cocky men.

Cocky men try too hard to impress.

Cockiness hides insecurity. Cockiness is low self-esteem turned outward and is the very antithesis of an assured, strong man.

A cocky man attempts to win a woman over at any cost – wanting her to think he is the the richest, smartest, hottest, funniest guy in the universe.

Cocky men often talk over women and interrupt them, as they are so busy trying to jump in with their own opinion.

Do you feel threatened by intelligent, smart, witty women who can hold their own?

Come on, get honest here!

Do you put women down (often in a jokey way and in front of others)? Do you support her visions, dreams and goals?

Women LOATHE having to stroke a man’s ego and make them feel important. They are turned off by defiant, self-righteous men.

“Once you develop confidence, I

promise women will swarm you.”

Cocky versus confident.

Do you know the difference? Sure, it is often confusing and sometimes it is a subtle thin line.

Here’s the thing: A confident man has an unshakable belief within and possesses humility. A cocky man has an inflated ego and arrogant attitude due to a distorted self-image. Get the picture?

A man who is confident will engage in active listening with a woman, displaying genuine interest in her life (as he has self-belief) and allowing her to take center stage.

He looks her in the eye and displays sincerity, as he wants to build/maintain a strong rapport.

Don’t confuse cockiness with arrogance.

If you have made these mistakes, then you need to develop new skills.

It takes time and energy to improve yourself. However, once you develop confidence, poise and insights into what a woman wants and apply them, I promise you women will swarm to you as a result.

Annie’s 6 tips for being confident:

  1. Display genuine interest in what women have to say and who they are as a person.
  2. Be self-deprecating and don’t take yourself too seriously.
  3. Do not whine, complain or speak in an aggressive or offensive tone to bartenders, waiters or doormen.
  4. Always ensure you are courteous, charming and positive.
  5. Never poke fun at women. Be authentic, affectionate and complimentary in a genuine way.
  6. Make kind remarks like, “You are so easy to talk to,” “I enjoyed what you were saying earlier” and “I love your laugh.”

Guys, have you ever mistaken cockiness for confidence? Which tip did you find most helpful for improving this behavior?

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