What Is a Compatibility Quiz?

One thing I’ve learned over the years as a single observer of the dating world is that most people struggle to know what (and who) is best for them. And are we really surprised? In the pursuit of someone who can fulfill our sexual desires, our loneliness, or our belief that “opposites attract,” we (and I’m including myself in this) end up in relationships that don’t serve us. 

These observations are backed by numbers: 42% of all marriages will end in divorce in the United States. This is lower than the 50% myth you’ve probably heard before but still doesn’t inspire a lot of confidence. 

Evidently, we have a lot to learn about romantic compatibility. Perhaps more intentional methods of finding matches could help.

A compatibility quiz is exactly what it sounds like: A series of questions designed to determine the likelihood of a well-matched relationship between two people. 

Within the context of digital dating platforms, these quizzes exist to help singles minimize guesswork during their search for love. The quizzes place heavy emphasis on the qualities of a partnership that matter most. 

I’m going to dive into an explanation of the different types of compatibility quizzes, how they work, and how they may benefit you in your journey toward romance. So grab a pencil, buckle in, and prepare to take notes — there may just be a pop quiz in store for you at the end. 

Types of Quizzes | How It Works | Pros & Cons | Dating App Examples

Compatibility is difficult to gauge because it’s complex and multi-layered. The viability of any given relationship comes down to more than just growing up in the same town and having a shared appreciation for The 1975.

True long-term compatibility is much more about how you see the world, what kind of relationships have been modeled for you throughout your life, and what you envision your future to look like. Luckily, different types of compatibility quizzes help us flesh this out.

1. Relationship Compatibility 

Two people can have the steamiest, hottest, most feral sex in the world and still not be good for each other in the context of a committed relationship. 

Perhaps the two love-makers in question don’t have aligning communication styles, or maybe they don’t feel comfortable showing their love in the same ways. Their approaches to conflict could even mean they’re toxic together. Relationship compatibility quizzes help you measure these differences. 

For example, a quiz could ask you something like:

If you answered A, and a potential match on a dating app answered C, the quiz would likely mark your conflict resolution styles as incompatible. 

But, as I mentioned, multiple factors come into play here. One misaligned answer doesn’t necessarily indicate a totally bad match.

2. Personality Compatibility 

For almost my entire life, I believed that “opposites attract.” But after many years of testing this theory in my personal life — as well as observing relationships in the world around me — I’ve decided I’d like to make an amendment to this supposed “rule.” Now, I believe that opposites come together, but they don’t stay together.

In other words, I think we naturally find appeal in someone who is different from us, but that doesn’t mean it’s a good match. 

One day the novelty and excitement will eventually wear off, and all that will be left is the cold, hard truth: You just aren’t that compatible. And that’s OK! Hopefully you had a bit of fun while you were figuring it out.

Next time, you could use a personality compatibility quiz to help you get to this conclusion a lot sooner. 

These quizzes will often draw from established personality frameworks (such as Myers-Briggs, Enneagram Types, or The Big Five) to analyze various aspects of you and your potential partner’s personality to determine if you’re compatible. 

For example, if Partner A is a homebody, prefers reading books over nights out, and describes themselves as shy. They may not be a great match for Partner B, who is very outgoing, likes to stay busy, and is known by their friends as the loudest person in the room. 

Through integration of these social-scientific theories, these quizzes help shine a light on important differences between two individuals that could either make or break their romantic relationship. 

3. Lifestyle Compatibility

If lifestyle compatibility quizzes were around during the era of Sandy Olsson and Danny Zuko, the famous “it” couple of the 1978 hit Grease would have never existed. It’s so obvious to me, it makes me want to scream.

Sandy is a kind, considerate, bubbly bookworm who spends her nights doing homework and practicing high-flying basket tosses for the upcoming football game. Danny, on the other hand, is a mysterious, motorcycle-riding alpha type who skips class and spends his free time stuffing innocent passersby into school lockers. 

In what world would this kind of relationship work?! There is none. And that’s because these two love birds have two completely different personalities, for one, but also completely different lifestyles (despite the little trick they try to pull at the end of the movie). 

Had either Sandy or Danny been given access to a lifestyle compatibility quiz, they would have likely seen that they had incongruent visions for how they wanted their lives to turn out — whether that was career-wise, financially, religiously, or even familially. 

These kinds of quizzes can help you do the same, too. And, hopefully, before you embark on a full-body makeover. 

Compatibility quizzes may aim to achieve the same goal, but you’ll find distinct differences between them depending on the platform/app that you’re using. These variations lie in the types of questions asked, the ways in which the scores are calculated, and how the results are analyzed. 

1. Question Types 

Many digital dating interfaces will incorporate multiple-choice format into their compatibility quizzes. Users often find this format to be easier and more digestible. The example used under the Relationship Compatibility section reflects this type of question. 

Some platforms will use Likert scales, which are designed to place opinions, attitudes, or behaviors on somewhat of a spectrum. For example, you may be asked to indicate that you “Strongly Disagree,” “Disagree,” “Feel Neutral,” “Agree,” or “Strongly Agree” with the following statement:

“When I make a mistake, I take full responsibility for the outcome.” 

Lastly, however more uncommonly, you may come across a compatibility quiz that asks open-ended questions. These questions serve to derive more personalized and detailed responses from you. An example may be:

“Describe a time when you and your partner resolved a conflict successfully.”

2. Dating Collection and Scoring Mechanisms

Once you and a prospective match have completed your compatibility quizzes, it’s time for the answers to be processed and scored. Each answer, regardless of the type of questions asked, will have a value or weight assigned to it. 

These values will then be added and used to determine a score of compatibility, which could be analyzed by the platform in various ways.

It could be a simple calculation or an outcome determined with the help of an algorithm. As we get deeper and deeper into the AI era we’ve found ourselves in, the latter will likely be more prevalent. 

An algorithm is “a set of defined steps designed to perform a specific objective.” In the context of dating apps, the objective is to predict compatibility between two individuals. 

Using the scores provided by compatibility quizzes (which are taken at the beginning of the onboarding process when you sign up for a dating platform), AI-based technology determines how well certain character traits, lifestyle habits, and relationship goals may fit together in a duo. 

As a user on a dating app, potential compatible matches may be presented for you to scroll through at your leisure, or they may be unveiled to you in batches. Coffee Meets Bagel, for example, only presents users with a small selection of contenders every day at noon. This can be helpful if you struggle with an overwhelming number of choices. 

As with any technological advancement, there are positives and negatives to compatibility assessments. And it’s important that you consider both of them when making decisions about what’s best for you on the road to romance.

Perhaps the most beneficial aspect of compatibility quizzes is that they take a lot of the guesswork out of a process that is plenty arduous and rage-inducing as it is. 

Instead of letting our hearts (or genitalia) lead the way, these algorithm-based assessments use social science-based research and theory to shed light on compatibilities (or lack thereof) that we may be too infatuated (or lust-struck) to see. 

Like I said before: Humans have been historically mediocre at selecting partners that are good for us. Why not take some tasks off our plate and save ourselves the mental gymnastics?

On the other hand, it’s important to note that compatibility quizzes (or dating apps, period) cannot offer you 100% guarantees. They’re based on mathematical formulas, after all. And math simply can’t account for all the complexities of humans and human relationships.

For example, you could meet someone and find that the sound of their voice makes the hairs on the back of your neck stand up. Or you could discover that they’re extremely rude to wait staff at the restaurant where you have your first date. 

Or, even worse, you could find out that you’ve been catfished by an old high school bully. Ain’t no kind of formula that can account for that kind of outcome. 

Lastly, privacy concerns are a consideration for many who venture into the world of online dating. The information you provide in your assessment can be personal and compromising, or used for targeted advertising. That said, you may choose to opt out of this risk by leaving the space altogether. 

Now that you have a better understanding of how compatibility quizzes work, let’s take a look at a handful of dating apps where you can try them on for size.

1. OkCupid: This free app, which is on the smartphones of approximately 11% of dating app users in the U.S., is known for its lengthy and meticulous compatibility quizzes. I’m talking over 5,000 optional questions.

And while OkCupid doesn’t necessarily have the mainstream recognition of apps like Tinder, the app’s smaller dating pool and stronger emphasis on the qualities that matter could be a breath of fresh air for more serious daters.

2. eharmony: Launched in the year 2000, this app will be known throughout history as one of the most popular dating app OGs, and its approach to compatibility is staunchly science-based. The platform matches singles based on personality types, values, and lifestyle habits. 

3. Match: Match burst onto the scene approximately five years before eharmony, and it disrupted the dating world — for better or for worse — forever. With a focus on forming genuine, meaningful relationships, Match offers a variety of quizzes to help gauge compatibility. It incorporates questions based on the theories proposed in The Big Five factor model.

4. EliteSingles: The name kind of gives it away, but EliteSingles is a dating app tailored for high-status professionals looking for serious, long-term relationships.

“We are so incredibly lucky to have found each other.” — Shane and Shannon

To assess compatibility between two users on this app, its compatibility quiz will include questions about educational background, financial status, lifestyle habits, and ambitions.

5. Christian Mingle: Many Christians feel it’s important to find a partner who values their religious commitment in the same ways they do. Luckily, this app was designed to help Christians do just that. When taking the Christian Mingle compatibility quiz, you will not only answer questions about personality types and ambitions, but also about your denomination, how often you attend church, and what kind of role God plays in your life. 

After many years of being single, I can say that compatibility quizzes have done wonders in minimizing dating app burnout and helping me save precious mental energy that could be spent elsewhere. 

Instead of overwhelming me with matches and leaving me to my own devices, dating apps take the important factors of romance into consideration and helps me whittle down my options and visualize important similarities and differences more clearly. 

This doesn’t mean that compatibility quizzes (or dating apps) are my end-all-be-all. And they shouldn’t be yours, either.

I’m a steadfast believer in the power of intuition, and I believe it deserves a place in your decision-making process as you search for long-lasting love. In fact, I think a fair balance can be found between the two. You can use compatibility quizzes on dating apps to narrow down your choices, then let your intuition take the wheel from there. Best of luck!