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People who are diagnosed with the herpes simplex virus might assume that that’s the end of their dating life — but, they’d be wrong. While herpes may halt intimacy every once in a while, it’s more common than you may think. According to the American Sexual Health Association, approximately one in eight people have genital herpes. They also claim that up to 90% of people may have it and not even realize it due to being asymptomatic.
While herpes can give daters pause, it’s not necessarily a dealbreaker when it comes to love and romance.
That said, herpes is still a sexually transmitted disease, so it’s something you should always be upfront about when talking to someone new. With the right precautions, you can be more in control of your outbreaks and symptoms, which will help you continue to have a regular dating life. As you may have figured, herpes dating sites abound where you can connect with positive singles, to make it a non-issue altogether. Here’s everything you need to know about the best positive dating websites on the market.
Relationships: Hookups Only
Match System: Search by location, interest, more
Our Experts Say: “Make no mistake: this site isn’t about making friends, it’s about finding hookups and casual encounters. No adult site has a larger or more active user base of those seeking discreet fun…”
Browse Free: View Photos Now
User Base | Gender Ratio | Popularity (Visits/Mo.) |
Free Trial
|
All Singles* |
65%*
35%*
|
25.5 Million* | 3 Months @ $19.95/Mo |
When it comes to hookups, Adult Friend Finder is a popular site to check out. As the adult dating site states, “Sexuality is diverse and personal. We provide a world where you can get the most out of your sexuality. Our mission at Adult Friend Finder is to create opportunities and experiences to live more passionately.” That means that it may be a good place to look for those who are also open about their diagnosis.
Even though Adult Friend Finder wasn’t built with the STD community in mind, many of its users are open to talking about it and treating it as something to understand rather than something to fear. Plus, signing up is free. If you like how the site works, you can move to a premium membership to unlock the private communication feature and video content.
Adult Friend Finder is an old-school dating website that doesn’t have a matching algorithm, but it does offer a mobile-friendly interface where STD singles can log in through any device, scroll through profiles, and meet people at their leisure.
Relationships: Hookups, Casual Dates, Affairs
Match System: Search by age, location, appearance, and more
Our Experts Say: “With its massive user base and advanced privacy features, Ashley Madison is the #1 site for discreet hookups, dates, or relationships…” Full Review »
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User Base | Gender Ratio | Popularity (Visits/Mo.) |
Free Trial
|
All Singles & Attached* |
71%*
29%*
|
65 Million* | Browse FREE |
While Ashley Madison is best known for promoting affairs, the online dating site offers so much more. For one, it’s a good site for people with open relationships to find potential partners. It’s also a great way to meet more mature singles who realize you’ve likely already had a lot of prior dating and life experience. That in itself makes Ashley Madison a decent dating pool to browse for users who are herpes positive.
Even though the stigma with herpes is starting to fade, older adults can often be more understanding than the 20-something crowd. Being part of a “hush-hush” community may also make you feel more anonymous. You needn’t broadcast that you’re herpes positive on your dating profile. Instead you can share that personal information once you start creating a meaningful connection with a new person.
Relationships: Hookups, Chats
Match System: Search by encounter, location, and more
Our Experts Say: “Absolutely free to sign up and browse profiles, BeNaughty is the top pick of millions for local “adult dating.” If you are looking for sex only — straight, swinger, gay, lesbian — this is your site…” Full Review »
Browse Free: View Photos Now
User Base | Gender Ratio | Popularity (Visits/Mo.) |
Free Trial
|
All Singles* |
48%*
52%*
|
13.3 Million* | Browse Profiles Free |
Known as the “naughty site for local singles,” BeNaughty sees millions of active users every month and promotes casual dating opportunities for people of every sexual orientation. You can start for free or check out a paid subscription, which can offer privacy features, better profile screening, and endless chatting options.
The casual dating site is discreet — it was founded in 2000 but isn’t openly talked about the way mainstream dating sites like Match and eharmony are. If you’re looking for a hookup but don’t want to get in the way of a committed relationship, BeNaughty can help get the job done. Just remember to always disclose your STD status. BeNaughty is not a website created solely for singles the herpes community, but its judgment-free atmosphere has made it one of the best dating sites for herpes dating.
Positive Singles is an STD dating site for people who have herpes or other sensitive conditions. The site is a great way to meet people who understand what it’s like to get that dreaded diagnosis. Positive Singles boasts being the #1 site for people with active STDs, including herpes, to connect. It’s also completely anonymous, so you have nothing to lose by signing up for a free account.
The online dating site originated in 2001 and has made over 60,000 love connections. The forum offers information spaces where members can also learn about treatment plans and get to know more about their condition.
“I contacted HSV2 from someone I fell in love with. It was worth the risk, she fully disclosed [it] before we met. It seems like an insignificant virus and still does,” someone wrote in their testimonial.
While Positive Singles is a great website, it wasn’t the first to make a safe space for people with herpes to meet. MPWH has been around since 1999 and prides itself on being the first of its kind. Unlike Positive Singles, MPWH is just for people with herpes, so you can expect most, if not all, users to be completely understanding.
Sometimes just chatting with others who are going through similar challenges can be an uplifting experience and change your mindset when it comes to dating with herpes. The MPWH website and app make thousands of connections yearly, and everything on the herpes dating site is anonymous for extra security.
Finally, there’s Herpes Passions, which is part of the global Passions Network. Herpes Passions labels itself as 100% free, but you can also pay a membership fee to limit the ads and receive more messaging opportunities.
All in all, the nichde dating site focuses on relationships over hookups. In fact, they don’t allow any sexual content or activity on the site, making it a safe and friendly place for people just looking to meet others. They have a section on their site for those seeking “friends who understand,” which makes it an excellent choice for mental and emotional support, especially after getting a diagnosis.
The answer is yes, but you should also think about what you’re hoping to get out of the experience before signing up. When looking for long-term relationships, eharmony is quite successful. Since launching in 2000, it’s responsible for making over 2 million connections. That said, eharmony has some limited functions over other websites; it doesn’t include quizzes or too much space to express yourself individually.
Relationships: Casual Dates, Deep Relationships
Match System: Personality test suggests matches
Our Experts Say: “Accounting for 2% of U.S. marriages, eharmony’s compatibility-based system and commitment-minded user base are ideal for those seeking a serious relationship…” Full Review »
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User Base | Gender Ratio | Popularity (Visits/Mo.) |
Today’s Deal
|
All Singles* |
48%*
52%*
|
4.1 Million* | View Profiles FREE |
That means that it doesn’t make it easy to have a conversation about your herpes diagnosis, so it’s something you’ll need to mention first. For many people with herpes, that’s second nature — but if you’re worried about how someone might respond, an STD-friendly dating site would be the better way to go.
Bringing up herpes is likely best done through messaging — telling someone in a text-based fashion makes it easy to get the information out and make things apparent before meeting in person. It’s also a good way for the recipient to have some time to absorb the information before responding.
Free dating sites like OkCupid are celebrated for having unlimited messaging.
Known for its fun quizzes and algorithms, OkCupid offers tons of communication options with its free membership. You only need to pay to access special features such as unlimited likes and getting to see which profiles “liked” you.
While you’re probably familiar with Facebook, you may not know they also have a successful dating app as well. Facebook Dating came onto the scene in 2018 to shake up the dating world. All you need to do is create a dating profile in the Facebook app before liking and — if the liking is mutual — messaging others on the platform.
While premium memberships can create a much better user experience, sometimes it’s good to check out the free basics of a site before taking the plunge. Membership won’t guarantee you love — but, it may change your attitude on how you approach online dating.
Flirt.com is a casual dating site that encourages active users to invest in their love lives. Some communications are free, but the majority of Flirt members have paid for credits to unlock messaging privileges.
Relationships: Hookups, Casual Dating, Chats
Match System: Search by age, location, gender, orientation, and other factors
Our Experts Say: “Flirt.com frees singles to chat with attractive locals and pick up dates on the spot. This hookup site is always open to horny and sexy people seeking one-night stands, casual dating, threesomes, and other sexual encounters…”
Browse Free: View Photos Now
User Base | Gender Ratio | Popularity (Visits/Mo.) |
Free Trial
|
All Singles* |
48%*
52%*
|
1 million* | Browse profiles for free |
Sometimes, just knowing that you’re paying for something will inspire you to spend more time interacting with it. The more time you put in, the better chance of finding someone who hits all of the marks in terms of what you’re looking for in a partner.
You may assume that genital herpes is a dealbreaker for everyone, but it’s not. Many people will simply appreciate the honesty you have in coming forward with your STD status. It’s important to have that conversation as soon as possible — and definitely before a relationship turns physical.
Avoidance could even lead to a lawsuit down the road. If someone rejects you for it, just know that it wasn’t meant to be. Surely the two of you would have had other incompatibilities down the road that hadn’t revealed themselves just yet.
While it might be hard to grasp once you get your diagnosis, you need to realize that you can still have a happy, successful dating life ahead of you. The right partner won’t judge and will be on board when it comes to safety within a physical relationship.
As time goes on, living with herpes will get even easier — but you need to be honest, cautious, and proactive to help avoid spreading it.
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