If you want a discreet dating platform to keep your love life as private as possible, Ashley Madison is an obvious choice. The app maintains a space where discretion is a top priority. It can satisfy your needs without letting the whole world know about it.
A lot of questions come with looking for the most popular discreet dating site. Is Ashley Madison legit? How much does Ashley Madison cost? The dating site and app constantly update, so it can be tricky to track down the info for the new prices. We’ve got the full details in this Ashley Madison review.
Ashley Madison Is Totally Free for Female Members
If you’re a woman, you’re in luck! You can enjoy full access to both the Ashley Madison website and app without spending a dime on essential features. Female users can send and receive unlimited messages without needing a credit card, and most other benefits are fully available to them as well.
While everyone and anyone can sign up for free, and build a profile, Ashley Madison offers a lot of bells and whistles to keep things interesting.
- Relationships: Hookups, Casual Dates, Affairs
- Match System: Search by age, location, appearance, and more
- Our Experts Say: With its massive user base and advanced privacy features, Ashley Madison is the #1 site for discreet hookups, dates, or relationships. Our Review »
- Browse Free: View Photos Now
Women have at least indirect access to things like virtual gifts and enhanced privacy features like private photo albums without having to pay. Anything you need to find, contact, and make something happen with another person is available to you without charge if you’re a woman. This has been the case since Noel Biderman launched the dating platform.
Of course, some bonus features are pay to play. For example, you can pay to boost your visibility on the dating site and app, so your profile comes up higher in search results or your messages appear first in someone’s inbox. But any features you have to pay for are strictly extras if you’re a woman. They aren’t necessary to get things going with a potential match.
This free access for women is one way Ashley Madison addresses a ubiquitous problem on dating platforms, which is having a lot of men join, but very few women. Because it doesn’t cost women anything to participate, they are more likely to sign up for Ashley Madison. That helps to keep the percentages closer to 50/50 in terms of membership.
Price Breakdown: Male Members Buy Credits to Chat Online
Male users on Ashley Madison don’t get the free ride that women on the site and app do, but the affair dating platform does take a different approach to providing premium features compared to a lot of other sites and apps out there. Instead of making each male member on the platform pay for a subscription, men on Ashley Madison have the option to purchase credits and use them as they see fit to access the features that matter to them.
Ashley Madison credit comes in packages that range from 100 credits for $59 to 1,000 credits or more. The more credits you buy at once, the lower the price tends to be, so it makes sense to buy the largest number of credits you can readily afford at one time.

Once you’ve secured your credits, the possibilities on the site and app open up for you as a male user. The premium experience on Ashley Madison offers some clear advantages, like enhancing your profile visibility with Priority Man. This feature places your profile in the top three search results for any Ashley Madison user, boosting your chances of being noticed by ten times. You can also use credits for the Priority Mail tool, which elevates your message to the top of a potential partner’s inbox.
And of course, whether you’re a married man or single, you’ll spend credits to gain access to your messages. With the Message Plus package, you can skip the member-initiated contact fee for the first month. After that, you have the option to either pay the fee or use your credits.
Ashley Madison members with credits also have other options for spending their virtual currency that aren’t quite so obvious. For example, you can send a partner a virtual gift, such as a rose or another token of your affection and interest.
Additionally, you can opt for Traveling Man status, which lets you virtually leap to upcoming travel destinations to browse profiles and find potential matches before you pack your bags.
Ashley Madison uses a credit system for men on the site and the app primarily to avoid fake profiles and scammers. The payment makes it expensive for scammers and bot operators to do business on the site, but, of course, it doesn’t make it entirely impossible. Fortunately, if you run into a fake account instead of a real woman or man, Ashley Madison will issue a refund. You can also get a refund if another Ashley Madison user harasses you.
A Discreet Payment System Keeps User Secrets
If you’re a man with an Ashley Madison profile, you definitely want to maintain your privacy. Paying to access key features of the service may seem like a big gamble, but Ashley Madison also brings discretion to its payment systems.
The name Ashley Madison won’t appear on your credit card statement so you won’t be caught. Instead, the dating platform usually uses a vague description like “online services,” and recommends that members make a note somewhere of the amount and date of their charges to recognize them independently. This is so you can keep track of how many credits you should have, in case of a technical issue or other hiccups.
For added privacy, Ashley Madison offers a wide range of payment options for buying credits. You can purchase with PayPal, or through iTunes or Google Pay, and you can also use a prepaid gift card. You don’t even have to use a Visa, MasterCard, or American Express gift card. Some users pay for their Ashley Madison credits with retailer gift cards, including Starbucks gift cards.
4 Ashley Madison Alternatives
These four sites offer many of the core features and benefits that Ashley Madison provides, with a slightly different twist. Although Ashley Madison is the best-known dating site catering to married people, it’s far from the only platform out there. Whether you’re looking for love as a married person or just want to keep your dating life discreet, these four platforms offer options outside of Ashley Madison.
- Relationships: Hookups Only
- Match System: Search by location, interest, more
- Our Experts Say: Make no mistake: this site isn’t about making friends, it’s about finding hookups and casual encounters. No adult site has a larger or more active user base of those seeking discreet fun. Our Review »
- Browse Free: View Photos Now
Adult Friend Finder has been helping married people as well as singles for decades, so it’s no surprise that it’s a popular option for affair seekers. The no-judgment atmosphere on AFF makes it easy for married people to open up about what they’re looking for, although if you’re seeking a long-term romantic relationship as opposed to a hookup or casual encounter, you’ll have less luck.
Adult Friend Finder welcomes anyone over the age of 18 and of any sexual orientation or gender identity to explore and find people in their area for sex. The casual dating site puts adult content right up front, with spicy chats and forums, videos, and photos to keep you in the mood while you seek out a potential match, whether it’s for an extra-marital affair or a one-night stand with another single person.
Like Ashley Madison, Adult Friend Finder doubled down on efforts to help users remain private after a hacking attempt. These measures include photo-blurring tools, anonymous usernames, and premium feature tools to keep your online dating life a secret.
NaughtyCharm
- Relationships: Hookups, Chats
- Match System: Search by encounter, location, and more
- Our Experts Say: NaughtyCharm is a premier hookup app where you can feel comfortable expressing your desires. Plus, it’s free to join, browse, and flirt.
- Browse Free: View Photos Now
Although NaughtyCharm isn’t specifically an affair dating website, a married person is just as welcome as a single person, and couples and swingers also call the adult dating platform home.
Like the other sites on this list, NaughtyCharm offers a lot of tools to help protect your privacy while you look for your next sexual encounter, whether you’re seeking a one-night stand or an orgy. In terms of payment plans, premium features on NaughtyCharm come with a few different subscription options, as opposed to a credits model.
Basic members have access to more basic tools for privacy and security, like Safe Mode, which automatically blocks members flagged for suspicious behavior. But users with either the Extra Security package or the Premium Dater package gain access to browser history clearing, incognito mode, and Full Safe Mode, which allows only verified members to send you messages. NaughtyCharm also encourages discretion by only providing a few key details for users to fill in, leaving it up to you to reveal or conceal as much as you want.
- Relationships: Affairs, Friends with Benefits, Casual Dates
- Match System: Browse by appearance, location, lifestyle
- Our Experts Say: Affairs aren’t taboo on Victoria Milan. The married dating site lets individuals be honest about their intentions and flirt anonymously. It’s an exciting place to try new things. Dating profiles might mask their faces in photos, but they’ll bare their fantasies in their bios. It’s free to join and see the date options out there.
- Browse Free: View Photos Now
Victoria Milan is an affair site, geared toward an international user base and with an even heavier emphasis on privacy. While Ashley Madison balances keeping things discreet while maintaining a shame-free attitude about affairs, Victoria Milan seeks to destigmatize affair seekers by highlighting the many reasons people might look outside of their committed relationships.
When you sign up for Victoria Milan, the staff reviews your account details with the proverbial fine-toothed comb, making sure nothing you include gives away who you are. This includes the screen name you choose as well as the details you provide to potential matches.
Victoria Milan also provides multiple tools to keep your profile picture anonymous, from blurring to a virtual mask, and even a public/private toggle that prevents others from seeing your photos until you’re ready to trust them. The platform also offers anonymous texting, for another layer of privacy.
4. Gleeden
Gleeden is another affair dating app, but unlike Victoria Milan or Ashley Madison, Gleeden explicitly puts women first. The platform is proudly created by women, for women, and that approach shows in the features, tools, and perks that Gleeden offers.
Like Ashley Madison, Gleeden allows women to chat and message 100% for free to anyone they find on the app. Also like Ashley Madison, Gleeden doesn’t charge a monthly subscription fee but instead allows men on the platform to buy credits to gain access to the specific features they want.

Where Ashley Madison allows users to put photos into a virtual vault that unlocks with a password, Gleeden requires men on the site to use credits in addition to the password lock to gain access to photos. Male users on Gleeden also use credits both to read messages and write initial messages to a potential partner, although after the first message, men don’t have to pay further.
One unique benefit to this affair site is its one-time-use subscription model. Gleeden doesn’t include any automatic renewals or refills of your credits, which makes it even easier to be discreet.
FAQs: Is Ashley Madison Worth the Price?
Whether Ashley Madison is worth the price or not depends on your priorities. If you want to keep your dating life private, whether because you’re already married or because you just don’t want your romances to be public, the features that Ashley Madison offers can make a big difference. Keeping your personal information discreet and secure can be worth a lot, especially if you’re married and want to stay that way.
Are Casual Dating Sites Like Ashley Madison Safe to Use?
It’s certainly safer than trying your luck meeting people in person, especially if you’re married and staying in your local area. Each Ashley Madison account comes with a level of security, and while it’s not foolproof, you have significantly more control over your information than on other sites.
The biggest concern on almost any online dating site or app is scammers and fake profiles, and this concern takes on a whole new dimension on dating platforms like Ashley Madison. A fake profile may not just be a scammer, but someone catfishing on behalf of your spouse to expose you.

The Ashley Madison hack in 2015 made it very clear that a lot of people want to expose cheating spouses. Ashley Madison’s response to the hack made it clear that the people behind the site take user privacy seriously.
The dating site’s features include anonymization tools like password-protected photo galleries, photo-blurring tools, and browser history clearing. Something that distinguishes it as a discreet dating is its anonymous billing codes and the panic button to instantly navigate you to a neutral website in case someone walks into the room.
Ashley Madison Costs Nothing to Join & Explore on the Side
Curious about exploring new options or imagining what it’s like to step outside your marriage? You can join Ashley Madison for free. The dating site and app provide complimentary registration, browsing, and search capabilities, allowing you to wink and favorite accounts without cost.
Many people wonder if they can use Ashley Madison effectively without paying a monthly fee. The answer is yes! While some features are behind a paywall for men, you have the flexibility to choose only the features that matter to you, rather than paying a flat monthly rate.
