Key Takeaways
I tested the Feeld app and compared it to mainstream and sex-positive dating sites with options for poly and kink daters.
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I got 25 likes within my first 30 minutes of swiping of Feeld.
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I saw more monogamous than poly people on Feeld, and the chats were pretty vanilla.
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AdultFriendFinder: Best Overall Feeld Alternative
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KinkyPeopleMeet: Best Site With More Kink Filters & Explicit Content
Feeld is a dating app for couples, throuples, queer people, the curious, and the open-minded. Seriously–the website lists all of these things on the homepage, which made me wonder if it was perhaps casting too wide a net.
That’s part of the app’s mission: to be a judgment-free place where everyone can find what they’re looking for. You might assume at first glance that this is an app for hookups. In my experience, it’s about much more than that.
When I tested it out, I found that Feeld users certainly cut to the chase and can be sexually forward. But overall, open-ended exploration is the biggest focus. Feeld is a space where kinksters, poly people, and all types of experimental daters can come together. I’d say it’s a pretty good time!
Feeld Touts Open-Minded Dating, But These 3 Apps Have More Kinks
Everyone is welcome on Feeld. It’s a smattering of different types and intentions. That can be frustrating for folks with specific kinks, so if you’re looking for a sex community with filters for fetishes, I’d recommend these three dating sites:
- Relationships: Hookups Only
- Match System: Search by location, interest, more
- Our Experts Say: “Make no mistake: this site isn’t about making friends, it’s about finding hookups and casual encounters. No adult site has a larger or more active user base of those seeking discreet fun.” Our Review »
- Browse Free: View Photos Now
AdultFriendFinder allows curious singles, couples, and groups to create a profile and filter for local matches by kinks and physical characteristics. This is a good place for sexting strangers, seeking swingers, and exploring kinks on the down low.
There is a livestream feature if you want to watch but not partake, as well as a forum where it’s free to chat all things kink. Think of it sort of like Facebook, but sexy. I saw a lot of posts about wanting to meet up or plan an orgy, and I like that there’s no shame in talking about fetishes and fantasies here.
Fling.com
- Relationships: Casual Dating, Hookups, Friends with Benefits
- Match System: Search filters
- Our Experts Say: “Fling.com keeps things casual and connects horny adults with video and direct messaging. It doesn’t ask for real names, but it will verify photos as genuine to ensure catfish don’t last long here!” Our Review »
- Browse Free: View Photos Now
Fling.com allows couples to sign up alongside single people. As the name would suggest, the focus is on meeting for discreet, potentially kinky encounters. It has search filters by fetishes such as threesomes, BDSM, and mutual masturbation.
Plus, nudity is allowed and even encouraged on the profile. Paid members even unlock video features that include stripper livestreams.
- Relationships: Hookups, Casual Dating, Kinky Chats
- Match System: Search by age, location, gender, kinks, and appearance
- Our Experts Say: “KinkyPeopleMeet is a sex-driven site where kinksters share their fantasies without shame. It’s a dynamic community for hooking up. And the photo and video galleries offer plenty of titillating inspiration as well.” Our Review »
- Browse Free: View Photos Now
As the name advertises, KinkyPeopleMeet caters overtly to people in the BDSM lifestyle with lots of kink-specific filters and sexually charged content. It’s free to message on here, and you’re welcome to send explicit content.
KinkyPeopleMeet has profile fields for all kinds of sexual fetishes, and members can identify where they stand on a sliding scale from Vanilla to Freaky.
How Feeld Works & What Happened When I Tested It
After downloading the app to my iPhone and confirming my email, I entered my birthday and name, then was presented with long lists to help me choose what I was looking for (dating, kinks, monogamy, community, friends with benefits, and more), what my kinks were, and how I’d describe my sexuality.
Being single, I opted out of adding a partner profile. I typed a short bio: Bi girl with interests in brat play, three-ways, general BDSM. If you want to know more, just ask. Curious about the world and about you!
I finished it out with a few selfies. It’s worth noting that, unlike other kink apps (including the ones listed above), Feeld does not allow users to post nudes.
On the Discover homepage, I was able to filter my swipe deck by distance, age, and gender. More advanced filtering by location and kinks was restricted to paid members.
I left my filters purposely broad: 18 and over, all 20 genders in the list Feeld provided. And I noticed an immediate difference from the app I’ve used before. Feeld was so diverse!
I saw young bi men, middle-aged trans women, and men in their 60s–everyone seemed to put lots of effort into their bios and, like me, opted to be very clear about their sexual desires.
I picked up over 25 likes in the first 30 minutes of being on Feeld. Some people almost instantly matched back with me. I took this as a testament to the active user base. That’s not something I usually see on niche apps. When I tried FetLife, it was noticeably short on active profiles.
The first pro of Feeld was that everyone was very direct. People love to pen-pal it up on other apps and just exchange messages for weeks without making a plan, but almost every opening message I received on Feeld felt more intentional.
Many users responded to something in my profile. Even people who were more general in their openers (like “how are you doing today?”) were quick to set up a time for drinks.
I appreciated that most of my matches seemed experienced in the kink world. While I’m no expert, I don’t like to try something new with someone whose only knowledge comes from porn. I don’t want an untested partner who might lead me into something unsafe.
Fortunately for me, so many Feeld profiles listed the number of years they’d been involved in the lifestyle as well as their last STI test date. Super. Helpful.
Sometimes, the directness could get a little uncomfortable– I know it’s a sex app, but I don’t always want to get graphically descriptive chats right off the bat.
Additionally, I was a little frustrated that all the fun kink filters were paywalled, but I still felt like I got plenty of matches regardless.
Why Some Users Give Feeld Low Ratings
I had a great time as a lurker on Feeld, but plenty of users don’t like it very much and have legitimate complaints about how it operates and who it really helps.
First, some people in ethically non-monogamous relationships complain that many Feeld users claim to be ENM but are actually just seeking “unicorns” for threesomes rather than actually being in the lifestyle.
Another user said that, despite its original reputation as a place to go for non-vanilla sex and dating, the app now feels inundated with “normies” seeking one-night-stands and people who are there just to cheat.
“Redownloaded feeld and it was just an overstimulation nightmare? I only got two dates from the app.” -Posted on r/feeld
Since I’m not necessarily ENM–just kinky–I may fall into this category of one-night-stand normie, which could skew my perception of Feeld as being a good app.
The biggest complaint I saw about Feeld actually seems to be about getting banned without reason. In one Reddit thread, multiple people stated they had no idea why they were banned.
Given the sensitive sexual nature of connections here, it’s possible that matches reported them after meeting in person. Or perhaps they never verified their pictures and were flagged. Feeld bans users without giving a reason, so it’s impossible to know for sure.
Feeld’s rapid growth also hasn’t come without a few bugs. I blamed my older-model iPhone for how the app would constantly freeze mid-swipe and drain my battery, but other users have shared the same experience.
Paying for the Majestic membership might provide a smoother experience, but I personally find it a little expensive (about $30 a month). And I don’t want to deal with the hassle of canceling before a certain date to avoid an extra month of charges.
I’ve also seen reports that customer support isn’t very responsive, with multiple Redditors claiming it can take weeks to get a response and that it’s rare to hear back unless it’s a billing problem or a new bug.
FAQs: What Is Feeld?
Feeld is a dating app where open-minded singles and couples can connect with other people in alternative relationships or with unorthodox kinks to meet up, hook up, or just chat. It’s an app for anyone wanting to date off the beaten path.
Is Feeld Free to Use?
Feeld is free to use, and you get a lot of bang (literally) for your buck without having to upgrade. The free allotment of 40 to 50 likes per 24 hours was plenty for me. I generally only send a few likes at a time to avoid getting overwhelmed.
I felt like the options presented to me in the general Discover screen were varied enough to satisfy me without having to pay to see who liked me or scroll through a dedicated section of standouts.
I think for male users, it could be worth seeing who likes you first to speed up the match process. On any app, not just Feeld, it tends to be more of an uphill battle for men to get attention.
If you want to pay, Feeld’s Majestic membership isn’t too different from other dating apps: you get unlimited likes, one free Ping daily to show someone instant interest (akin to a Super Like on Tinder), and the ability to go back and like someone you accidentally swiped left on.
The features most relevant to kink dating are the advanced filters and the ability to go Incognito, which keeps your profile hidden until you like someone. The paid plan also allows you to selectively share photos with Connections only.
All that will run you $29.99 for a month, $49.99 for three months, and $149.99 for a year. You can also buy a pack of 10 Pings for $20.99.
Is Feeld Safe for Couples and Singles?
Like any other dating app, Feeld is safe to use as long as you take precautions; don’t be intimidated just because it’s a more fetish-friendly app. No matter whether you’re browsing single or with a partner, you need to be able to spot fake profiles. Think too-good-to-be-true photos or chats that go straight to inquiring about personal information or banking.
Plus, if the profile photos are unverified, that could be another clue you’re dealing with a catfish. (You can verify your profile by taking a selfie that Feeld’s third-party partner compares against your uploaded pictures.)
When I met someone from Feeld in person, I was careful to FaceTime him before meeting and suggest a public place for the first date, even though we had every intention of heading back to his apartment after. I also made sure a friend had my location.
But if he had made me uncomfortable at any point before or even after, it would have been easy to block or report him directly from his profile. Feeld will remove a blocked person from your chats and the Discover feed so you never have to interact again.
Something else I appreciated was that the app hides photos from screenshotted chats, lessening the chances of any sensitive images getting leaked. To practice truly discreet browsing, however, you’ll need the aforementioned Majestic membership.
Is Feeld Better Than Tinder for Ethical Non-Monogamy?
Feeld is definitely better for ENM dating – Tinder does not even have an option to register as a couple. While you could theoretically try to include photos of you and your partner on the same Tinder profile, the app’s Community Guidelines prohibit multiple people accessing the same account, so you run the risk of catching a ban.
“Each account can only have one owner. For logistic and privacy reasons, we can’t support multiple people accessing the same account.” -Tinder policy
Tinder does offer ethical non-monogamy as one of its options for desired relationship types, but most of the Tinder profiles I swipe past are monogamous.
Since Feeld specifically targets poly individuals in a more sex-forward fashion, I’ve found that it’s the much better, more inclusive choice for non-monogamous connections.
Feeld Is Worth Trying, But It’s Not the Only Poly-Friendly App
For me, Feeld lived up to its mission of embracing alternative sexual desires and relationship types. The user base was not only more open-minded, but more straightforward, too. I loved being able to open with a message about a shared kink and bypass the usual weeks-long buildup to seeing if we’re sexually compatible.
As long as you’re comfortable setting your boundaries upfront, it’ll work well for you too.
Since I’m pretty staunchly monogamous, I can’t speak for poly daters, but it seems Feeld has mixed reviews in the ENM lane. If Feeld seems too vanilla or glitchy for your needs, just know it’s certainly not the only option. Plenty of Feeld alternatives, like the ones on this list, are dedicated to poly dynamics or specific kinks. Get out there and explore your options!
