Let's Talk Approaching & Flirting (Page 6)

When the girl you’ve been secretly in love with for months or years breaks up with her long-term boyfriend, you’re excited because this is your chance to jump in to rescue and date her. Hold on…not so fast! While I know this may seem like the perfect opportunity for you, it’s not! No matter who broke up with who, breaking up is hard on both people involved. It’s the end of a relationship where they had a real...

A lot of men looking to up their social game fall into the seduction community at one point or another. There are a lot of reasons this turns out to be a bust. I’m not going to explore those today. What I am going to explore is the number of ways the seduction community, also known as pickup artists, can make you a bit weird — to your friends, to your family and ultimately to women. 1. Smug superiority. This is a...

Reader Question: I go to a community college and there is a girl I like that goes there as well. The problem is she's always walking. She's never sitting at a table so I can just sit with her and talk. The only way I can talk to her is just wait for her class to end and walk with her as she walks by the lounge. What can I do to make a move on her without her thinking I'm a creep? -Shane (Pennsylvania) Dr....

How many single guys fantasize that Friday and Saturday nights will be filled with fun, flirting and meeting plenty of new women to fill up their social life? Too often, however, weekends out on the town end with nothing more than a huge bar tab, a drunken slice of late-night greasy pizza and a taxi ride home without a single decent conversation with a woman. Or, if the guy has been practicing how to get more...

When the daffodils are breaking through the remaining snow on the ground, that slight fragrance of springtime flowers has everyone venturing out more and turning their sights to the possibilities of new romance! When you're getting out of the house more, then it is easy to increase the number of people you meet this week. And some of them may be a mature single like you! Where are some creative places for mature...

“Where do I go to meet quality gay men?” is a question I hear a lot from single guys aspiring to meet their Mr. Right. After a long dry spell of being on the solo circuit, or even experiencing a series of recurring dating disappointments, the frustration can ultimately balloon into a sense of defeat and jadedness if not careful. The gay bar has been a traditional place where gay men have been able to meet each...

You’re grooming yourself because it’s the perfect night to go out with your friends looking for girls. However, your energy is dropping and you want to do something to get you pumped up for the night. What do you? Don’t use alcohol. It’s a crutch that should be left in the refrigerator, or better yet, the trash. Instead, try these three methods… 1. Blast your stereo while taking a shower. It doesn’t matter...

Do you find yourself in the friend zone often? How many times have you met a woman, became interested in her and asked her out, only to find yourself hearing her tell you these words: “You know you're cool, but I just can't see us as more than friends.” It's driving you crazy, isn't it? You take her out to dinner, spend some money and go in for the kiss, but she pushes you away. She doesn't want anything more than...

Let's get open and real today. I'm going to ask you a question, and you're going to give me an honest answer. What is your eye contact like? Do you even know what your eye contact is like? Are you aware the eyes are the way to turn a woman on? Do you also realize the more powerful your eye contact is, the more quickly you’ll turn her on? Most guys suck at eye contact. When most guys approach a woman for the...

Introducing yourself to that hot lesbian you spied out doesn’t have to be hard or scary. Let me share three steps for making your move. First, let's get a picture in your head of the opportunity: You are in your favorite coffee shop getting your morning half-caf, half-skim latte. Behind the counter is a new employee and she’s taking your breath away. Wow! She has all the telltale signs she’s lesbian. After...

In this technologically advanced world, it can be hard to maintain any hopes to finding romance. Any acts of passion can be far removed from your emotions, initiated by downloading a dating app on your smartphone. Clubs are designed with the similar goal of instant gratification: Get in, get drunk, get off. Where does old-fashioned romance stand in such a world? Recently, I plucked up the courage to go over to a...

Reader Question: I am a 20-year-old male and I haven't been in a solid relationship since high school. I met this girl at a get-together. The next day, I found her on Facebook and told her I really hoped I would get to see her again. I got a positive response. This girl left an incredibly lasting impression on me. I'm just kind of tired of me trying to play the trial-and-error game, and I want to at least get up...

Approaching women on a regular basis is the first key step to dating success as a man. Unfortunately, it's not enough to approach women. If you want good results, you also need to do it in a particular way. Your mindset and your behavior have to be in the right place. Most guys fail miserably when they approach women because they make three big mistakes. I'd like to show you what these mistakes are so you can...

It’s a common saying these days. All your friends are whispering it in your ear: “She’s out of your league.” My first advice is not to hang out with these discouraging friends of yours. Secondly, she’s not out of your league. In fact, she’s extremely obtainable. Let me explain. 1. We all have flaws. Imagine it now: You walk down the street to get a cup of coffee and you see your dream woman walk past. A...

Reader Question: I have seen this woman several times at the grocery store. I can tell she is very shy. I am also shy and I don't want to create an awkward situation for her. I have made up my mind to say hi the next time I see her. Saying hi will be the easy part. She is very pretty, but I don't want my first comment to be about her looks. What do I say? How do I keep a conversation going? How do I make her...

I don’t advocate single men to go out at night simply for the sake of “going out to meet women.” Whether it’s another Friday night, a birthday, New Year’s Eve, whatever, as men we have a tendency to convince ourselves we have to go out if we want to attract women into our lives. We have to go to the bar, we have to go to that party, we have to go meet women… Too often, all that expectation we put on ourselves to...

If you’ve read most dating books, you know a longstanding cardinal rule has been for single women to let the guy approach first. However, with advances in modern technology have come advances in modern dating. Most men now say they prefer a woman to say hello, or at least display some sign of interest in chatting with them. If you have your eye on a guy and want to strike up a conversation, here a few easy tips on...

Your eyes catch the handsome stranger from across the bar and you find yourself captivated — he’s just your type. “Go talk to him,” your friend nudges. As your head swirls with imagery on how you might approach him, your body tenses with anxiety. You begin to worry about how you might be perceived or misunderstood. Fears of rejection and embarrassment immobilize you. Frozen in place, you try to muster up the...

You’re thinking, “Man, she’s cute. Is she looking at me?" And she’s over there thinking, “I want to meet that guy. How can I? Should I walk up to him? I know I shouldn’t, but I hear it’s OK to signal him with a look and a smile. Why isn’t he coming over to me? He’s probably married. Maybe I’m not his type. He’s probably gay. Do I have spinach in my teeth?” Really, we girls have that kind of silly internal dialogue...

Reader Question: I am a 29-year-old male with very little dating experience. I recently asked a girl I met while walking from class for her number. It's been two days and I want to call her to ask her out. Should I go with something specific like, "Are you free Wednesday night for dinner?" or should I say something like, "Would you like to go out with me?" -JW (Washington D.C.) Dr. Wendy Walsh's Answer: Dear...

I just finished a coaching session with a new client. Throughout the whole time we were out in the field and I was having him approach and talk to women, he kept asking me questions about what others (the women he was approaching and the "bystanders" who were in earshot) were thinking about him. This raises such an important issue, and I want to share with you what I told him about this issue. I bet many of you have...

One of the top issues people I coach encounter in trying to meet people of the opposite sex is the fear they will be rejected - and in public - if they approach a member of the opposite sex. Here is a quick mindset tip for all of you who share this particular issue, and I'm going to demonstrate it with an actual interaction I had with a client. David: "Did you see me on the front page of the Los Angeles Times today?...

It might have surprised you. You were out with friends and she walked into the room. She might not have even noticed you, but you definitely noticed her. Now you can’t stop thinking about her. She’s older and sexy in a very different way than lesbians your own age. She’s confident. She’s sure of herself in ways that some of the lesbians you’ve dated who are your own age aren’t. She’s had a lot of experiences and a...

Reader Question: I am a single man age 36. I haven't been in a relationship in about five years. I somehow always end up in the friend zone. I have strong morals and am not really big on sleeping around. I reconnected with a gal I went to prom with my senior year in high school. I never put pressure on her and am not clingy and give her space. I think I am in the friend zone but am not sure. She said she isn't into...

Reader Question: There is a woman (w/young child) that lives next to me. She seems to like me but when I asked her out, she said her ex-husband had died last August and she needs time. What should I do in the meantime to show I do like her without being overbearing or insensitive? -William Webb Dr. Wendy Walsh's Answer: Oh William, I wish you lived next door to me! OK, this is easy. Start to be helpful....

Can women flirt to gain the upper hand when negotiating? A new study attempted to answer this question, setting out to determine the potential positive or negative impact from women using their “feminine charm” in negotiations. The participants consisted of 100 students (36 female and 64 male) who were enrolled in an MBA negotiation course. Students were asked to fill out a survey to determine their likelihood...

Can you believe we have such little time left on this planet before the end of the world comes on 12/21/12? So what are you doing with your limited time? Are you actually asking out women you've never asked out before? Because I think you should. Here's my suggestion: Let's say the world does end on Friday. Let's say it's over. It ceases to exist. Why are you wasting time on the Internet right now when you could be...

I get lots of letters from guys asking how to become a more skilled flirt, and while it seems like a very sophisticated and crafted social skill, it really isn’t as mysterious and elusive as it may seem. It’s not about performance. It has more to do with you being yourself and exuding a relaxed demeanor and confidence. Those with good self-esteem and who are comfortable with their sexuality tend to fare better...

Do you have a crush on a woman right now? Is there a woman out there you really want to get to know better? Are you too afraid to talk to her? She might be the clerk at the grocery store. She might be the barista who serves you drinks in the morning at Starbucks. She might be somebody that works on the same floor as you. Nevertheless, ‘tis the season to be giving, and it's time to get creative. So how do...

Where ever you go during your day, whether it is going shopping or going to the library, grabbing a bite to eat or riding the train, you are already surrounded by tons of other people.  Take a look around you each day. You have potentially at least hundreds of people you could be meeting each day. Some of them are your fellow seniors, and even some of those people are single just like you are. So what are you...